Of Headmasters and Socks
by The Red Dragons Order
Summary: FINISHED! Dumbledore has disappeared! What to do! The Hogwarts staff bring the most Slytherinish Gryffindor into the picture. Add four crazy ghosts, stir and serve!
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I own only the obvious, the rest belongs to JK Rowling.

Authors Note: Just something that popped up and wouldn't leave me along. Thanks to my wonderful beta's _Lexi-formerly Katy999_ and _Tabitha_.

Chapter One-

"Minerva, please tell me you're kidding." A paler-than-normal Severus Snape exclaimed. It was a few days until the new school year started and they were on their way for the traditional staff meeting.

"I'm afraid it's true, Severus," the Gryffindor Head of House replied. "Albus has gone missing, and I haven't been able to find him. Even Fawkes failed."

"When did this happen?"

"Albus was last spotted visiting that brother of his, Aberforth. He left a couple of days ago, and should have been here by now."

"Perhaps he's playing some sort of trick on us. You know how weird his sense of humour is." Severus suggested. He did _not_ want to even think about the old Headmaster missing this close to the start of the term.

"I know that his sense of humour is… one of a kind, but you and I both know that he wouldn't pull a stunt like this on us." Minerva sighed. "What are we going to do?"

"Not tell the public for one thing, and neither the other teachers." The tall man thought for a while. "We can tell those few in the inner circle of the Order, and have them look for Albus while we try to keep things in order around here."

"But how are we going to explain the absence of the Headmaster to the others?"

"They won't know." Severus replied. "We need someone who can act as Dumbledore until we find him."

"Well, his brother is completely out of the question. That man is even worse than Albus; and besides, he is too involved in his experiments to even notice his brother missing. We could have asked Mr. Malfoy to take the position, but he's currently running the Unspeakables as you know. To make a long story short: where are we going to find a person who has had a close friendship with Albus for some years and knows his habits and quirks, is good at acting and doesn't have anything on his plate at this point? Not to mention the fact that the Polyjuice Potion cannot be used as you actually need the person you're trying to impose as, there all the time."

The two of them had reached the doors leading to the staff room. Severus had his hand on the doorknob and was ready to turn it, when Fawkes came flying down the corridor holding something in his claws.

"What is it?" the Potion Master growled to the phoenix. The bird dripped the parchment into his hands then settled on his shoulder. Snape glared at the brilliant bird, then unrolled the parchment.

Minerva jumped when the usually emotionless man exclaimed: "_HA_! Here's the perfect person for the job!" He handed her the parchment. It was a poster for a play:

_'Gaston Leroux's_

_'The Phantom of the Opera' the Musical_

_Arranged and adapted by Andrew Lloyd Webber_

_With stars like:_

_Lisa Vroman as Christine Daaé_

_John Cudia as Raul, Viscount de Chagny_

_And Harry Potter as the Phantom of the Opera_

_Coming soon to Broadway'_

"Severus, old friend, what would I do without you?"

"Just say it, Minerva, Slytherins are better than Gryffindors."

"Keep dreaming." But she was smiling. "Now, how do you suppose we get the world's most Slytherin-ish Gryffindor to help us with this?"

"Leave that to me." Severus replied and they entered the staff room. While the meeting was held, his thoughts went back in time a few years to the Great War between the Light side and the Dark side, and how they had finally won after five years thanks to the previously undiscovered Slytherin side of Harry Potter.

In the summer after the boy's fourth year and the TriWizard Tournament, Potter had gotten so depressed that Albus feared for his life and sent someone to take him back to the safety of Hogwarts. They had given him extra lessons in Defense, Charms, Potions, Transfiguration, Dueling, anything that could help Potter through the war, but the Gryffindor had seemingly lost his spirits completely. For lack of anything better to do, the Boy Who Lived had started to spend more and more time in the library. It must have done something good, for the Gryffindor had slowly gone back to being his noisy little self though more quiet.

Then the news had hit them. Voldemort had gotten a powerful new recruit who was swiftly moving up through the ranks of the Death Eaters. Severus and Draco had been their main informants on what was going on inside the Dark Lord's Fortress, but neither of them had had the time to blink before the unknown person had become Voldemort's right hand man. Lucius Malfoy had, to put it bluntly, been completely pissed at this, and made the greatest mistake of his life. He had underestimated his opponent. A month later Malfoy Sr. found himself quivering at his Lord's feet, trying to explain to everyone that he was not a spy for Dumbledore. But the evidence – which, Severus had noted afterwards, had been pointing at the Potion Master - had suddenly altered without anyone noticing until it was too late. Lucius Malfoy died like a coward, trying to plead his way out of the whole thing until the end.

Voldemort's right hand man had always been helping their Lord with the planning of the newest attack or raid. In fact, the Dark Lord had been enchanted by the younger man, and hardly went anywhere without him by his side. Voldemort always asked for the other man's opinion on something before taking a decision. Many things could have ended worse than they had because the man convinced the Dark Lord it was better to wait. The red snakelike eyes glazed over when the man whispered in the Dark Lord's ear. The voice behind the Death Eater mask was silky, warm and made you want to trust it, something that had made both Severus and Draco wary and suspicious.

Speaking of suspicious, it made the Order of the Phoenix extraordinarily proud of their two spies when the said spies always managed to get hold of Voldemort's most crucial plans. But the two Slytherins weren't that convinced that they _'always were at the right place at the right time'_ as Dumbledore had put it. Someone was leaking information to them, and by the look of it, someone high up in Voldemort's inner circle. But the person was too good at hiding his trail, and the two spies never figured out who it was until the end of the war.

Five years after the TriWizard Tournament, it had come to a showdown between the Light and the Dark. Severus and Draco had show their true colours and had ignored the Dark Lord's call in favour to stay with Dumbledore. The two sides had met somewhere in the Scottish countryside, glaring at each other. The Potion Master had seen the Dark Lord standing in front with his right hand man, calmly awaiting what would come. Some insults had been exchanged and then hell broke loose.

To everyone's surprise Potter hadn't showed up for the battle. Many lost their courage and hope, while others called him a coward and traitor. Then there had been a humongous explosion followed by an earthquake, and everyone – Death Eater as well as Phoenix Agent – had looked up to the hill where Voldemort had been standing. They gaped. Over the Dark Lord stood his most trusted helper, wand pointed at the snakelike man's heart. They watched as the man removed his Death Eater mask and was then immediately surrounded by a white light. When the light was gone, Harry Potter was standing over the terrified Dark Lord, his green eyes glowing almost golden with power.

With only two words – _"Annullare animus!"_ – spoken by Potter, Voldemort had disappeared in a flash of light. The spell roughly translated to 'destroy soul', so there was no way that the Dark Lord could come back this time. In the time after the war the curse had been labeled as the fourth Unforgivable, and Potter had gotten an Order of Merlin First Class medal for his deed. Since their Master was gone, the Death Eaters had given up and let the Aurors round them all up and bring them to a new prison.

However, it had been the explanations afterwards in Albus' office that were the most interesting. Potter had apparently tricked them all royally. Of course, as the young man had said, at first he really was depressed and paid no attention to his extra lessons. But one day as he had been roaming the library, the ghosts of his mother, father and Cedric popped up and gave him the tongue lashing of the century. When even the three of them couldn't get through to him, Cedric had left and then popped up again with the ghosts of Godric Gryffindor, Rowena Ravenclaw, Helga Hufflepuff, Salazar Slytherin and Merlin himself.

Slytherin had literally shaken some sense into him, and then the nine of them sat down and devised a way of getting rid of the Dark Lord. It was Ravenclaw's idea to make a new spell, and Merlin's idea of how it could work. The following months had been spent training Harry in the Ancient Magic, including Shape-Shifting, Voice Charming, Wandless magic, Animagi and numerous others. After two years the Boy Who Lived had joined the Dark Lord as a new recruit, and started to ruin the whole organisation from the inside. The rest of the story they knew already.

After that meeting, Potter traveled the world, seeing and doing things that he had always wanted to, and writing to his friends to keep them from going bananas with worry. He had showed up for a couple of days at the combined weddings of Ron and Hermione and Draco and Ginny, but left again as soon as politely possible. When Severus had asked him why he didn't just settle down, Harry replied that he was finally free and was going to use this chance of living life without the threat of Voldemort looming over him. And now, as it turned out, the Man Who Defeated Voldemort had gone into the acting business.

"Severus? Are you listening at all?" Minerva's voice brought him out of his thoughts. The rest of the room was empty save for them.

"I apologise, Minerva, what did you say?"

"The meeting is over, not that you paid attention to it, and I just asked you if you would accompany me to The Three Broomsticks." The Deputy Headmistress closed the door to the staff room after them.

"I'm afraid I have to decline," Severus replied. "The sooner I get hold of Potter and explain the situation to him, the better."

"Alright, but be careful or else you might get tricked upside down. You know, I heard a thing last year. Apparently one student had asked something down the lines of _"Is Slytherin evil?"_ and then the older student replied with: _"Is Potter the biggest con in history?"_ and that ended that debate."

"I assume that Slytherin was evil then?" Severus asked, a tint of amusement evident in his voice.

"You're right too, the poor first year nearly ran screaming into the night whenever he saw a Slytherin coming towards him; and before you ask, no it was _not_ a Gryffindor, and yes it was a Hufflepuff."

"One can always hope."

"Severus!"

"What? It's a free country."

"I give up, you're impossible."

"Correction, I am a proud Slytherin." Severus smirked as Minerva shook her head. Beside Albus and Draco, she was the only one that he let through the barriers that he had built up over the years. "Well, time to go and pick up Potter."

"Be careful."

"I always am."

Severus apparated into the back of the Broadway theatre. From there he watched as a man kept ordering the actors about.

"No, no," the man exclaimed. "There must be more feeling in it, John. Your character is in love with Christine, for heaven's sake! He doesn't hate her. Alright, let's take a break from this and go to the scene where the Phantom leads Christine through his underground labyrinth."

The three actors that had been on stage left and a woman with curly hair that reached her shoulder blades came out. The people involved with the props brought out a tiny boat that reminded Severus of the gondolas in Venice, and put it left on the stage. Some brought out several chandeliers and that was about it.

Then a man appeared and entered the boat. He was wearing a tuxedo with a long cape, a hat and a white mask that hid half of his face. However, there was no mistaking the unnaturally green eyes that glinted in the dim light. The woman sat down in the boat, and Potter began to push off with a long stick.

Potter's dark voice washed over him like black silk. It made Severus shiver.

The woman continued where Potter stopped.

Then both sang inperfectly harmony with each other.

Then the invisible chorus sang a couple of lines before Potter again took over.

The woman looked at the Gryffindor as she sang her lines.

"Sing, my Angel of Music!" Potter exclaimed and the woman did so. "Sing!"

"Alright, cut! I think we've got that scene perfect. Everybody take a break!" the director yelled. The dark music stopped, Potter got out of the boat and helped the woman out before disappearing backstage.

Severus shook himself and quickly followed after the green-eyed man. Potter disappeared into a dressing room and took off the hat and mask. Suddenly several ghosts materialised and began to applaud him for a song exceptionably sung.

"Even I got scared!" one of the ghosts admitted and the Potion master recognised the man as Salazar Slytherin.

"You're always scared." Another one countered. It only made sense that it was the ghost of Godric Gryffindor.

"Why you little-"

"Boys! Will you stop it!" a short woman walked in between the two glaring ghosts. Then she spotted the Head of Slytherin House standing in the doorway. "Oh my, Severus! How nice to see you again."

"You too, Helga." Severus replied. Godric grinned and went to fetch Potter who had gone into the bathroom while they had been arguing.

Potter appeared a few seconds later, wearing only pants and drying his hair. He was lean and only a couple of inches shorter than Severus himself was. The man looked up and smiled. "Well, come in, Severus. I assume that this isn't a social call?"

"You're right, Potter. If I wanted company, I would've picked someone with more brains, but enough about that. We're in a bit of a fix back at Hogwarts."

"Oh?" Potter picked out a shirt and put it on.

"Yes, it seems like our dearest Headmaster has done a disappearing act."

"Really?"

Severus nodded. "Even Fawkes couldn't find him; and this close to term too…" he let the sentence end in mid air. It was all a game that Slytherins always played. The point was to see who could keep their anger/curiosity/annoyance in check the longest. The one who first exploded was weak and could easily be manipulated.

"That really_ is_ bad." Potter said in a nonchalant voice.

"Yes, indeed. After talking it over, Minerva and I decided that it would be best not to tell the public anything lest we would want to create mass hysteria."

"Smart choice."

"So then we ended up with the problem of how to cover Albus' disappearance to the public and the rest of the staff. Any ideas, Potter?"

"Not at the moment, but I'm sure that you will enlighten me."

"We get someone to play Albus while the Order of the Phoenix is searching after him. Now, after considering several candidates we got to the conclusion that – as much as I hate to admit it – you would be best suited for the job." Severus continued as though the other man hadn't spoken at all. Potter raised an eyebrow. "You have had a close friendship with the Headmaster and know most of his quirks, and you're also the only Shape-Shifter that we know about." The Potion Master replied to the unasked question.

"Ah, logical. Alas, I'm sorry I must disappoint you, Severus. I have my hands full already, and Albus is a grown wizard. He can take care of himself." Potter was about to exit the room when the ghosts of the Four Founders of Hogwarts cornered him.

"Now you listen here, young man." Rowena said, her hands at her hips. "You are going to help them with this lest you want us to haunt you day and night for the rest of your life." The thing was that the Founder of Ravenclaw always followed through with her threats.

"But what about the play?"

"It can go jump off a cliff." Helga replied.

"Besides, wouldn't it be one huge achievement if you managed to juggle both Hogwarts and this play at the same time?" Salazar asked.

"Come on, it'll be one hell of an adventure!"

"Godric!"

"What? This new way of speaking is pretty cool. I think I was meant to live in this time and not more than a thousand years ago." The other three ghosts rolled their eyes.

"Oh, alright. Severus, I'll help you with this as well as I can." Potter sighed. "But only to keep those four off my back," he mumbled so that only the Potion Master could hear him.

"Come to Hogwarts before the term starts, Potter." Severus ordered and apparated out of the theatre, leaving the Gryffindor to deal with four arguing ghosts.

Severus sighed as he watched the inner circle of the Order walk through the doors, chatting happily with each other. The circle was composed of several Weasleys, Draco, Minerva, himself and an old school mate of his, Mundungus Fletcher.

"Will you please sit down and shut up!" he commanded them once Minerva had closed the door to the room. They quickly did as he said and found their customary seats. "Now then, let's start the meeting."

"Wait a bit, Severus," Hermione Weasley spoke up. "Where's Albus?"

"That's why we have called for this meeting, Mrs. Weasley," the Gryffindor Head of House told her. "I'm afraid that the Headmaster has disappeared."

"What!"

"You've got to be kidding!"

"Did Fred and George beta some of their inventions on you two?"

"How did that happen!"

The Potion Master rubbed the bridge of his nose. "If you'd shut up for once and let us talk, you would soon know the whole story." He said in the deadly quiet voice he used in the classroom. It hadn't failed him in the past, and didn't fail him this time either. They shut up. Blessed silence. "Since you're the one who discovered that he was gone in the first place, Minerva, I'll let you take care of the explanations."

"Thank you, Severus." The Deputy Headmistress then proceeded to tell the group everything she knew about Dumbledore's disappearance. "Now, as you know, the press would have a field day with this story if it got out and therefore we have asked a mutual friend of us all to help us out."

The bushy-haired Hermione and Draco were the first to figure it out. Both stared at the two Professors with wide eyes, and when the two Head of Houses nodded, both began to laugh.

"Gods above! Hogwarts'll never be the same again – Dumbledore or no Dumbledore!" Draco howled between laughs.

"All I can think of saying is: good luck. God knows you'll need it."

"What are you talking about!" Ron Weasley exploded.

"The one who's going to take Albus' place until we find him." Hermione replied. "Not to worry dear, you know this person very well."

"… Rrrriiiiiighhtt. Now, who's going to take the Headmaster's place?"

"Who is the only person that could take the place of Dumbledore?" Draco asked.

Ron's eyes went wide. "No! You can't mean…!" both his wife and the blonde nodded with grins plastered on their faces. "Harry's going to play Dumbledore!" another nod and Ron fell off the chair with laugher.

"War hero Mr. Harry 'Boy-Who-Lived-Honorary-Slytherin' Potter coming to take the role as Albus?" Mundungus sounded awed, scared and amused at the same time. "God help you all."

"Thanks Gus, we need that." Severus replied to his old friend. "Now, while I and Minerva try to keep Potter out of trouble during the school term, we want the rest of you to search for our missing Headmaster."

"Where do we start?" Fred, or George, Weasley asked.

"He was last seen visiting his brother a week ago, so naturally you should start there."

"Right, get started everyone." Minerva clapped her hands signaling that the meeting was over and they started to file out.

At last it was only the Potion Master and the Transfiguration Professor left.

"I cannot help but feel that this is going to be a very exiting year, Severus," the woman said.

"That is an understatement," Severus replied. "Remind me to retire once everything is over."

I'm not sure if I should make this SLASH or just leave it as it is.

Please tell me if I should continue this.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I own only the obvious, the rest belongs to JK Rowling.

Authors Note: I had no idea that this would be so well-liked. And I am grateful for it. Anyway, most people voted for SLASH between SS/HP, and that's what this is going to be. However, I'm thinking of leaving this as a PG-13, and the romance-part will be almost invisible – a couple of kisses here, a hug there. Nothing too serious. If the rating changes, I'll inform you. 

Authors Note2: Thanks to my wonderful beta's _Lexi-formerly Katy999_ and _Tabitha_.  

-Chapter Two-

Harry smiled as Hogwarts herself came into view. The school was just as magical, just as royal as ever. He stopped just outside the tall iron gates and sighed. Time to put on the costume. 

A golden light gradually surrounded him, pulsating several times before it disappeared as slowly as it had come. Where once a young, black-haired man had been, stood an old man with silvery hair and beard, half-moon spectacles, overly coloured robes and twinkling blue eyes. 

Harry sighed and started towards the front doors. Since the Headmaster was a real live person, he could feel some of the power Albus controlled, and he could also feel the connection the Headmaster had with the school. The stone itself was talking to him, whispering of all the things it had seen or was seeing. It would take some time to get used to it. 

"Come now, Harry," Salazar appeared beside him. "It will all be over soon, you'll see."

"What a marvelous job you did of Shifting into Albus," Helga congratulated him. "I really cannot see any difference between the two of you." 

Suddenly Rowena appeared. "What do you think you are doing?!" she hissed. "We're supposed to be invisible. _Invisible! As in: no one can see us!" She grabbed the Slytherin Founder by the ear and the Hufflepuff Founder by her dress, and disappeared once again. The replica of Albus Dumbledore rolled his eyes and started to walk towards the school again. _

Just as he was about to open them, the doors opened of their own accord and let him in. Severus Snape stood in the Entrance Hall, glaring Shrieking Death at him. Well, some things never changed. 

"About time you showed up," the Potion Master growled. "Minerva and I have had our hands full trying to keep the other teachers from asking too many questions. Come along, I'll explain the rules of Hogwarts, the Headmaster's job and how to change passwords to you on the way to Albus' office. Minerva's waiting for us there, and she'll explain to you anything I might have missed." 

Harry hurried after the Slytherin Head of House. Snape hadn't changed one bit since the last time the Boy Who Lived had seen him – not counting the hurried meeting two days ago. The man looked the same as he had during the war against Voldemort nearly seven years ago. 

At a certain point in life all wizards and witches would stop aging for a while. The time where they did not age varied from person to person, but would last up to twenty years. It was mostly during this time that the oldest pureblooded families' heirs searched for their wife or husband. If they found someone the aging process would speed up again; but if not or if they were already married, then they would just carry on with life and wait out their time. 

Suddenly Harry realised that Snape was talking and hurried to catch up with the other man's long strides. "Sorry, Severus, but could you repeat that?"

Snape growled once again. "I said I trust that you know your way around the castle by now. Minerva has even managed to get hold of that dratted Marauders Map of yours from Filch's office, so you will have additional help. Did you get it this time, Potter?"

"If you don't want me here then I'll go." Harry turned but a strong hand grabbed his arm and turned him towards the black-eyed man. "Will you make up your mind?" 

"… Please… stay, Po-_Albus." The words looked like it had hurt getting them out. _

"That wasn't too hard, now was it?" Harry said joyfully, easily adapting Dumbledore's usually extremely annoying cheerfulness. "What did you say about the passwords?"

"All you have to do to change a password, is tap the guardian with your wand and say _Changement_. When you're done with that, just tap the guardian once again and say _Garder. Think you could remember that?" _

"Of course I could; really, Severus, there is no need to worry so much about me." The Shape-Shifter smirked – which looked very weird, as it was Dumbledore's face – when the Potion Master looked ready to kill him for that comment. 

"Ah, Albus!" Both of them looked towards the voice, and groaned. Trelawney was walking down the corridor towards them, looking like she had just won the Quidditch World Cup. 

Snape tried to slink away into the shadows and escape, but Harry quickly grabbed his arm and held him firmly. "Don't you dare leave me alone with her," he mumbled to the pissed-off Slytherin. Then he turned towards the Divination Professor and smiled. "Why, my dear Sybil, how nice to see you. Is anything wrong?" 

"Oh, Headmaster, I have just had a vision!" the bug-like woman cried, putting a hand over her eyes and shaking her head wildly. 

"Oh my, that really is something. Care to tell me about it?" Snape's eyes widened in horror and he wildly gestured with his hands to cut this off and get out of there. "I am sure Severus will be very interested in hearing about it as well." 

The Potion Master was reaching for his wand ready to kill Harry, when Trelawney turned and buried her face in Snape's robes, completely ignoring the deadly glare the taller man sent her. Harry just grinned. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad after all. He had already had the chance to insult and embarrass Snape thrice that morning. 

Snape was flexing his fingers, just itching to reach for his wand, but as Trelawney had both his arms pinned to his side – and she was stronger than she looked – then there was nothing he could do to blast that grinning idiot into the next millennium. Potter just winked to him when he glared. He was beginning to suspect that they wouldn't have had half as much trouble if they had just gone publicly with the whole situation. 

-------------------------

Dumbledore's office hadn't changed at all since the last time Harry had been there. It was still filled with weird Dark Arts detectors, books, candies, Fawkes, the Headmaster's desk, papers and a huge bowl of Lemon Drops on top of the desk. The phoenix flew over to him when he entered, and settled onto his shoulder. 

"Hey, Fawkes." Harry lightly petted the magnificent bird. "Mind if I settle down here until we find the real Albus?" The phoenix looked at him, then sang a short, happy tune and went back to preening itself. "I'll take that as permission to stay, though you will have to help me get around this office. I have no idea what's where." 

Harry started to explore the office to get an idea of where he could find everything, but with Dumbledore, you never knew, as he was not exactly the most normal person alive today. That fact was proven when Harry found a desk drawer full of Lemon Drops, and another heavily warded drawer full of socks. The Shape-Shifter shook his head and continued. 

By the time he was finished, Harry knew that the Headmaster kept all the student files on the left, Order files on the right, Ministry business in the middle and unimportant things – socks, Lemon Drops, Ice Mice, Muggle fantasy books – strewn all over the place. Fawkes was once again sitting on its perch, watching Harry with black eyes looking highly amused. 

"Oh shut up." Harry snapped to the phoenix. "You try to figure out Albus' un-logical logic." 

The phoenix clearly gave him a look that said: _I know something you don't know_!

"Oh yeah?! Well I know something you don't know too!" Harry whipped his wand out and pointed it at the bird. "Phoenix breasts taste wonderfully." 

Fawkes looked horrified at the wand, then at him and at the wand again. The look the bird sent him this time clearly said that it thought he was mad as a hatter. 

"What a wonderful office!" Godric had appeared and was busy examining one of the teacups on the table by the fireplace. It tried to bite him. "My, what they come up with these days." 

"Gryffindor! Turn invisible before Rowena shows up and gives us one of her lectures," Salazar hissed and appeared. 

"Why would she give you a lecture?" 

"Because I let you turn visible." Slytherin looked around. "Not bad." 

"That's what I said. Oh, look! They still have the Sorting Hat. Looks a bit worse for wear, but it's still there! Oi! There's my sword!" 

Slytherin snorted and turned to the phoenix. "Still with us, I see." Fawkes didn't even look up from preening his feathers. "Why does every creature except snakes ignore me?" 

"You really want us to answer that?" Harry asked and sat down behind Dumbledore's desk. He started to go through the desk to see if he could find something that could tell him what Headmasters did in their free time. Minerva still hadn't showed up, and after leaving Snape alone to handle Trelawney there was no one to tell him what to do. 

"Harry, there's-" Rowena floated into the room, but stopped dead in her tracks when she saw the two visible ghosts. "What did I tell you two? Oh, never mind." She turned to him again. "There's a short, fat man downstairs arguing with Minerva and Severus. He wants to come up here and talk with the Headmaster and doesn't look like he will be taking 'no' for an answer."

"Do you know the chap's name?" Harry looked curiously at the woman. 

"It was some kind of cake." Helga appeared. "Muffin?" she suggested. 

"Tart?"

"Pie?"

"Strawberry cake?" they turned to Salazar. "What? It's my favourite!" 

"I think you meant Fudge?" Rowena nodded. "He's the nincompoop that holds the Minister of Magic position." 

"I think I remember you telling us about him," Godric looked thoughtful. "Wasn't he the one who called you a deranged maniac?" 

"No, that was Skeeter, though Fudge agreed wholeheartedly with her." Harry slumped in the chair. 

"Watch it, Harry," Rowena stuck her head in through the door. "They are on their way up. Three Aurors are accompanying Fudge, and Minerva and Severus are trying to keep them from reaching this door." 

"Alright, I'll deal with them, you four make yourselves invisible." The Boy Who Lived straightened up, summoned a Muggle novel from one of the shelves and pretended to read. Not a second later the Minister entered, followed by his Aurors and the two Professors.

"Really, Minister, you can't just walk in without-" McGonagall cut off when she saw a complete double of Albus sitting at the desk. 

Harry looked up and smiled slightly. "Cornelius, what a pleasant surprise! Do come in and sit down. Sherbet Lemon?" 

"No, thank you, Albus, though you might not think this will be a pleasant surprise when I tell you the reason for my visit." The balding man sat down in one of the chairs in front of the desk. The Aurors surrounded him, and the Potion Master and the Transfiguration Professor positioned themselves on each side of the desk. 

"Well then, what seems to be bothering you?" 

"Oh for heavens… fine, Albus, if you want to play it that way I'll follow your rules." Fudge looked really annoyed. "What I am talking about is the You-Know-What in Gringotts." 

"Which vault?" Harry asked. His curiosity was piqued. 

"Huh?"

"My dear Cornelius, there are lots of You-Know-What's in Gringotts. You don't expect me to know every single one of them, do you? I need the number of the vault to know which You-Know-What you are talking about." Out of the corner of his eye Harry could see Snape's eyebrow rising unnoticeably. So, the Potion Master didn't know about this either. McGonagall looked just as befuddled. Interesting. 

The Minister looked slightly confused for a second, and then he put himself together. "I'm talking about the You-Know-What in vault 713."

"Oh, _that_ You-Know-What! Why didn't you say so before?" 

"Albus, you get more and more impossible every time we talk." Fudge shook his head in exasperation. "Well, what do you suppose we should do with it?" 

"What did you have in mind?" 

"My opinion is that we should melt it down and make Silver Sickles out of it. A thing like that cannot be allowed to, for lack of a better word, live."

Fawkes, who had landed on the desk during the conversation, shook his head wildly. "Really, Cornelius, why would you ever destroy something like that? Why not have it brought here to Hogwarts?" 

"To _Hogwarts_?! Are you _mad_?! The thing's magical powers could weaken the ancient wards of the castle, you should know that; and the children will definitely write home about it and soon the whole world will know!" 

"Cornelius, need I remind you that besides Gringotts, the only other safe place is Hogwarts?" Snape and McGonagall looked worried and curious at the same time. Harry himself thought he was doing quite a good job of acting as Dumbledore. So far, nothing life threatening had happened, though how long that was going to last was up to debate. 

"Besides," Harry continued, "if you turn it into Sickles, Galleons and Knuts, it's going to be spread all around the world, and imagine all the damage it could do like that." 

Fudge looked horror stricken. "You have convinced me, Albus. I'll bring it to Hogwarts within the week." The Minister got out of his chair and saw himself out, still looking terrified. 

"He's gone!" Rowena floated through the floor. 

At the female ghost's words the rest of the room's occupants relaxed. Harry let the mist take over him and changed back into his real form. Rubbing his eyes, he slumped in the chair. McGonagall sat down in the chair previously occupied by the Minister and Snape leaned on the windowsill. Godric, Salazar and Helga sat down in mid air. 

"So, anyone know what Fudge was talking about?" Salazar asked. 

"Unfortunately, no," Snape replied. "Albus has this weird urge to hide everything from the rest of us until the last minute." 

"Then we need to figure out what all this fuss is about." Helga looked determined. "Now, what could we gather about this thing from the conversation with the Minister?" 

Godric looked strangely at her. "I think you've spent too much time with Slytherin, you're starting to think like him." 

"Shush, you," Rowena glared and Salazar smirked. "I agree with Helga though. So, what do we know so far?"

"The Minister doesn't like this thing." Minerva said. "He wants to melt it." 

"Obviously it's magical and of great value, or else it wouldn't be kept in a high security vault." Snape looked thoughtful. 

Fawkes kept pushing a month-old article cut out from the _Daily Prophet_, towards Harry. The green-eyed man picked it up and started to read while the others in the room tried to figure out what they had agreed to bring into the school. 

"Um, guys," they stopped talking and looked at him, "I think I just found out what this is all about."

"Well, keep talking, Potter, we don't have all day here," Snape snapped. 

"Listen to this article: 

_'Major Treasure Found in France!_

_A couple of days ago Gringotts employee Bill Weasley found a most peculiar sword. This discovery was made in Paris, France, in the catacombs running for miles under the city. After numerous charms and enchantments, it was declared that the sword belonged to none other than Jeanne D'Arc herself. _

_Unfortunately the Gringotts guards didn't let anyone enter the tomb where the sword was discovered and Mr. Weasley refused to be interviewed, but we in the _Daily Prophet_ managed to sniff out the fact that the sword will be brought to England for further examinations.'_

Well, at least we know what this is all about." Harry finished looking at the rest of them. 

"I wonder why I didn't see that in the Prophet." 

"It's a pretty little article, Minerva, and it wouldn't surprise me if it was in a corner along with the advertisements." Snape, who had snatched the article out of Harry's hands, read it several times over before giving up. "So, what are we going to do? Where do we keep it? And how the hell are we going to keep this quiet from the public?" 

"That is a good question. How about we put the sword in the Chamber of Secrets?" Harry suggested after a while. "No one besides me could get down there, and we could easily get some creature to take care of it and put loads of ancient enchantments on it."

"And where would you get a creature that wouldn't mind guarding a sword? Not to mention that it has to be dangerous enough to scare people off, and calm enough to let us get down there on monthly checks – though I wouldn't mind skipping the check-ups."

"Easy, Severus, we just ask Hagrid for it." 

"Hagrid?! Hagrid couldn't keep a secret even to save his own hide! Have you gone mad?!" 

"Calm down, Minerva, I trust Hagrid with my life. And remember, even if someone finds out from our dearest groundskeeper about the sword, then they first have to get into the Chamber, and then get past whatever creature and enchantments we put down there." 

McGonagall blinked a few times, her eyes getting watery. 

"What now?" Snape asked. 

"You sounded just like Albus, Harry." The head of Gryffindor House whispered. "I- I'm sorry, it's just that…" she shook her head trying to put herself back together. "Sorry."

"Nothing to apologise for," Harry said smiling. "I'm sure that we all have to get used to this situation until the Headmaster returns." 

"Yeah, tell me about it." Godric mumbled. "I just discovered that a certain mutual Founder built a whole chamber without my knowing." 

"There is a reason why my House always gets the sneaky ones, Gryffindor, get used to it." 

"Boys!" 

"Leave them be, Rowena, after a thousand years of their bickering you should be used to it," Helga replied and patted the taller woman's arm comfortingly. 

"Yeah, leave us alone. We aren't going to kill each other."

"Not that we could, we're dead already." 

"I give up!" 

"That's the spirit!" 

-------------------------

Harry was on his way to visit Hagrid and ask him about a creature that could help guarding the sword. Snape was with him to make sure that he did not say or do anything that Dumbledore wouldn't have done. Minerva was left in the castle along with the ghosts of the Four Founders who still hadn't stopped arguing and insulting each other. 

"How you put up with the four of them, I will never know." The Potion Master mumbled. 

"Believe it or not, you get used to it, either that or you start ignoring it," Harry replied and made sure not to trip on the crazy-coloured robes that Albus seemed so fond of. 

"I highly doubt that, no one could get used to-" an angry screech from the castle cut his words off, "-_that!"_

"To each his own Severus, ah, here we are!" 

Hagrid, who was just coming from around the hut with Fang at his heels, stopped and waved merrily to them. Harry returned the gesture. "Professor Dumbledore sir! 'ow nice to see yeh again, did yeh have a good time visitin' Aberforth?"

"Oh, yes, simply marvellous! However, Hagrid, I was wondering if I could ask a favour of you?" 

"Sure! Come on in," the half-giant led them into the hut. Harry sent a quick glare to Snape, warning him about making any comments. The Slytherin looked as innocent as they come, and Harry only waited for him to start whistling and a halo to appear over his head. 

Hagrid was happily making tea and Fang was sitting and panting with his tongue hanging out of his mouth, waiting for his food. Harry seated himself in one of the wooden chairs at the table, while Snape positioned himself strategically and could keep an eye at the windows and the door. 

Hagrid put two cups of tea on the table, offered a third to the head of Slytherin who declined, and sat down opposite Harry. "What did yeh wan' to talk to me about, 'eadmaster?" 

"Well, it's quite simple, Hagrid. I need a creature that can guard a certain item that's being brought to the school." 

"Oh? Any specific traits it should 'ave?" 

"Yes, preferably so. First it mustn't have anything against staying in the Chamber of Secrets, and second it must be horrific enough to scare people away and kind enough to let us check this item once a month." Harry took a sip of his tea and nearly gagged. How the hell could Dumbledore drink something as strong as this?! 

"Hmm," Hagrid looked deep in thought. "I think I might 'ave somethin', and if not I could pr'bably get a 'old of it. 'ow are ye getting' into the Chamber?"

"Oh, er, Harry's going to open it for us." Snape looked like he wanted to bash his head into the wall. Repeatedly. 

" 'Arry's coming back?!"

"Only this once to open the Chamber," Harry quickly explained. "He's also going to bring a snake with special instructions that can open the Chamber for us while he is gone." Snape looked relieved. 

"So 'e is goin' ter come back ter visit?" Hagrid asked hopefully. 

"Something like that." Once again, Snape looked like he might murder him. "But Hagrid, how long do you think it might take you to get a hold of the creature?" 

"Oh, um, a couple o' days at most. When's 'Arry gettin' 'ere?" 

"In a couple of days." The Slytherin Head of House sent him his best death glare. It would have scared Harry when he was a student, but now he just raised an eyebrow. He and Snape really needed to have a serious talk later. Preferably without any Deputy Headmistresses or crazy ghosts intervening. Right now he had to get the Chamber ready for a beast of Hagrid's and a sword. 

This promised to be one hell of a year. 

~*~*~*~*------*------*~*~*~*~

Once again I'll say that this is going to be SLASH, but it's going to keep at PG-13 unless I change my mind. The romance won't be too noticeable… yet. 

-------------------------

**FRENCH**:

Changement: change, alteration

Garder: keep, retain

-------------------------


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I own only the obvious, the rest belongs to JK Rowling.

Authors Note: Hope you like this as well as the last one. And thanks to my wonderful Beta's _Lexi-formerly Katy999_ and _Tabitha_.  

-Chapter Three-

Rowena sighed as yet another fight between Salazar and Godric started. And the two had been talking about _cakes_ of all things! How they managed to make it personal was beyond her. Helga was currently touring the castle and flirting with both Nearly Headless Nick and the Bloody Baron. Believe it or not, the Hufflepuff Founder was a very big flirt. 

She looked over to the door as it opened and in came Harry, Minerva, and Severus. All three looked worried and a tad apprehensive. 

Harry spotted her floating in the corner, and walked over. "Rowena, good, we found you." 

Salazar and Godric had stopped trying to hex each other and were trying to use various items from around the room, but as their hands just went straight through them it never worked. 

 "Why, are there any problems?" she asked. 

 "Yes, we're going to have a couple of interviews in a minute, and I must ask of you four to check if the person really is as good in his or her field as they say." Harry was always polite with her and the other ghosts. He was such a charming young man. 

 "What position?" asked Helga who had just floated through the floor hanging off the arm of Nearly Headless Nick. "Don't worry," the Hufflepuff Founder added seeing their looks. "Nick and the rest of the ghosts – even Peeves – know about Albus missing and won't say a thing. Apparently it's a castle thing that was added after our time." 

 "The Defence Against the Dark Arts," the Slytherin Head of House replied. "With our history with Dark Arts Teachers, I suppose you can understand why we are worried." 

 "Yes, certainly," Nick said and patted Helga's hand gently. "The worst by far I believe was Lockhart." The three mortals groaned at the mention of the Blonde Prat from Hell. 

 "Of course we'll help you Harry," Rowena said smiling. "How man-"

 "If you don't stop insulting Gryffindor House right now, Slytherin, I'm going to ask Harry to throw that biting teacup after you!" Godric's voice cut through their conversation and they turned to the two fighting ghosts. 

 "Watch it Godric," Salazar replied, "your ego is getting too big for the room." 

 "Crawl back under your rock!" 

 "Go jump off a cliff!"

Rowena glared at the two men. "Excuse me," she said to the three mortals and the two ghosts, then stalked over to Gryffindor and Slytherin. She grabbed them both by their ears and turned invisible. A second later they heard two terrified shrieks, and all of them winced. The Ravenclaw Founder turned visible again, muttering darkly. 

 "What did you do to them, Rowena?" Minerva asked.

 "Nothing they didn't deserve."

 "I don't understand why we can't just find a powerful Necromancer, let him or her revive those two and let Godric and Salazar kill each other again." Harry said. "It would make all of us happy, and those two would stop fighting… hopefully." 

 "We've been dead for too long." She sighed and clapped her hands. "Now, as I suspect that the interviews will start soon, how about we get into our positions?" 

Harry turned into Dumbledore and sat down behind the desk, Severus positioned himself by the windowsill and Minerva went to get the first applier. Rowena ordered every ghost present to turn invisible and keep quiet. 

 "Having job interviews this close to term?" Harry said shaking his head. "Is Albus mad?"

 "Potter, this _is_ the Headmaster we're talking about. The same manipulative old coot who hired Lockhart, and who thought it was a good idea to have a Yule Ball every year," Snape growled. "Quite shortly, Dumbledore is the craziest person I have ever met." 

 "You have a point there," the usually green-eyed man was about to say something else when with a knock Minerva entered the office, a woman in her late thirties followed her. Harry slipped at once into the role as Dumbledore, and stood up while beaming at the two. 

 "Why, hello again Minerva, and welcome to Hogwarts Mrs…?"

 "Green," the woman answered with a superior air and shaking his hand. "The name's Anna Green." She had a slight accent.

 "Well then, Mrs Green, would you like to sit down?" Harry mentioned to the chair in front of the desk. "Sherbet Lemon?" he asked as she sat down and she declined. He shrugged, then popped one into his own mouth. He could understand why the Headmaster liked the sweets. 

 "Why don't you start with telling us something about yourself?" he suggested. 

 "I was working at the French Ministry of Magic, in the Department of Dark Forces Research," the first sentence was enough to catch the attention of all the others in the room. If the woman had worked in the Department of Dark Forces Research, it meant only theoretical knowledge. 

 "Why don't you still work there?" Severus asked suspiciously. 

 "I got bored of the paper work." 

 "All you will get here _is_ paper work, so what's the difference?" the tall man pointed out. 

Harry sent him a warning look even if he agreed with him. "Tell me, my dear, how are you with children?"

 "Oh, they love me and I love them," came the short, clipped answer. 

 "_Brakylogia tis Lakonike _[1]," Harry mumbled but continued louder, "are you good at duelling?"

 "Why do you ask?" the woman became defensive at once.

 "I was thinking of starting a Duelling Club this year, Mrs Green; and it would only be logical and natural for the DADA Teacher to lead it – with a little help from Mr Snape here for practical demonstrations." 

The woman paled at once and Severus smirked. "Why are you here really, Mrs Green?" he asked. "Is it because of the Sword of Jeanne D'Arc?" 

Not five seconds later Anna Green literally went flying down the stairs and out of Hogwarts. Helga Hufflepuff came back through the wall a minute later, mumbling something about wimps who couldn't even fall gracefully. Nearly Headless Nick looked a bit surprised at this show of violence, but shrugged it off again. 

 "Thank you Helga," Harry rubbed his eyes. "Fudge must've let the secret slip at the Ministry that the sword was being moved here. And he complained that the students would be bad!" 

 "Who's next Minerva?" Rowena asked.

 "A man named," the Deputy Mistress looked at her clipboard, "Thomas Molloy. Shall I go get him?"

 "Please do," Harry replied. "I'd like this over with as soon as possible." 

-------------------------

At the end of the day they had decided to hire Thomas Molloy. Out of them all, he was the best, keeping calm and cool throughout the entire meeting, and answering every question thoroughly. He had brown hair and eyes, a constantly smiling face and a kind word to anyone. He even accepted Harry's offer for Sherbet Lemons, something that surprised them all. 

 "Now that that's over, I'm going to bed." Harry yawned. He had turned back into himself right after the last person had left half an hour ago. "Gods, I really don't envy Dumbledore the position of Headmaster. Where the hell does he get all his annoying energy from anyway?" 

 "I personally think he's an alien," Severus muttered. He was rubbing his neck. A kink had developed for some strange reason or other. 

 "Anyone up for tea?" Minerva asked. 

 "Yes please," Rowena took a cup the Head of Gryffindor handed her and just held it in her hands without drinking. Strangely Helga and Nick had disappeared right after the meeting, and there hadn't been a pip from Godric and Salazar. 

 "When are we going into the Chamber of Secrets?" Snape asked as he accepted the tea handed to him. 

 "Definitely tomorrow," Harry replied. "Even without the creature Hagrid's providing we can put Ancient Magic and Wards down there," he buried his head in his hands. "I feel more dead than a dead person."      

 "You're not the only one," McGonagall muttered. "Well, at least we have a Defence Teacher now, the search after the real Albus is well under way and the students are returning in a couple of days." 

 "Good night." Harry yawned and stood up heading for Dumbledore's quarters. Then he stopped and turned back to Rowena. "What _did_ you do with Godric and Salazar?" 

 "As I told you, nothing they didn't deserve," she replied then smirked. "I locked them in the same room as Peeves and Filch. Warding it so that they couldn't get out until tomorrow." 

Everyone winced again. 

 "You are evil incarnate," Harry told her. "Good night all of you." 

 "Good night, Harry."

 "Good night." 

-------------------------

Severus glared as Harry led him towards Moaning Myrtle's bathroom. "Explain to me once again why exactly in heaven's name we are going towards a more or less ruined toilet?"

 "The entrance to the Chamber is located in that particular bathroom." Harry replied lightly. He was glad to be walking around Hogwarts as himself again. "Hey, don't look at me like that; it was Salazar who made the place." 

 "Well, if it hadn't been for a certain nosy Gryffindor Founder," Salazar materialized, "the entrance would be somewhere else." 

Godric turned visible as well. "Excuse me for caring about my students!" 

 "Oh no, here they go again." Harry groaned. "If you two don't want to be locked in a room with Peeves and Filch again, I suggest you shut up. Salazar, why don't you go ahead and open the entrance to the Chamber for us? Godric, shut up." 

The two ghosts sulked and pouted, but did as Harry had asked.  

Once they reached the bathroom they found Salazar chatting with Moaning Myrtle herself. The young ghost was blushing silver and giggled every five seconds; Salazar on the other hand was smirking triumphantly. The entrance to the Chamber was already open and Severus raised an eyebrow. The entrance to the legendary Chamber of Secrets was a _sink_?  

Harry went forwards and sent several Cleaning Charms down the pipe, then he sighed and jumped. Godric followed him, in turn followed by Salazar who blew a kiss to Myrtle. This proved to be too much for the girl because she squealed and flew off to hide. The Potion Master shook his head and jumped into the pipe. How the hell he always ended up with the idiots was beyond him. 

At the end of the slippery ride, Severus landed right on top of Harry who had just finished brushing himself off. 

 "Get off of me if you value your life, Snape," Harry growled. 

Severus sneered at the threat, but quickly stood up and looked critically at his robes. A quick Cleaning Charm later they were as good as new. "So, where to?" 

 "This way." Glowing slightly silver, Salazar started to float in front of them.  

 "For a paranoid idiot you have taste," Godric admitted as he followed his ghostly companion, glowing silver as well. He kept looking around the huge chamber in critical wonder. 

Both Harry and Severus repressed the urge to roll their eyes and followed the two glowing ghosts casting protective wards and charms as they went. Soon they reached the place where the roof had collapsed due to Lockhart's misfired Memory Charm. Salazar and Godric went straight through, but Harry and Severus were too big to worm their way through the hole Ron had made in second year, so they had to clean the mess away.

-------------------------

 "Damn." Harry sat down on a large rock. Who'd have thought that cleaning away all the rocks would be this tiring? 

 "I second that." Godric wiped some sweat off his forehead and sat down as well. 

Severus glared at the ghost. "You didn't do anything except give us tips, which didn't help by the way." He was leaning against a pillar, a cup of cold water he had conjured in his hand. 

 "You don't think that's tiring?" Godric asked. 

Harry turned to the Slytherin Founder. "You were right after all, Salazar; Slytherin really _is_ the best House."        

 "What's that supposed to mean?" the Gryffindor Founder asked and glared at the other ghost's triumphant smirk. 

 "My point was just proven." Salazar bowed sarcastically, still smirking. 

 "Will someone tell me what's going on?!" Godric complained. 

 "Quit shouting!" Snape hissed. "Or you'll bring the whole castle down on us, and I don't fancy being flat as a pancake." 

 "I will stop shouting when someone tells me what's going on!" 

 "Godric, you want me to call Rowena down here?" Harry asked.

 "On second thought, it might be best for all our interests to stay alive. Hogwarts is still needed in the world. No need for threats." 

Harry rolled his eyes, Severus growled impatiently and Salazar sighed throwing his hands exasperatedly into the air. "Heaven save us from death by Gryffindor stupidity and idiocy." The ghost exclaimed quietly. 

 "Hear, hear." The Potion Master pushed away from the pillar. "Well, Potter, ready to start again."

 "No, but I hardly think that matters." Harry stood and stretched. "Let's get started." 

-------------------------

They finished with the fallen rocks half an hour later, and two hours after that again they were done with casting charms, wards and Ancient Protection Spells on the entire place; they had even put in a couple of charms in favour of the beast Hagrid was providing them with. It wouldn't do good to slip on some of the creature's filth when they checked in on the sword. 

While Snape was taking a rest, Harry made a special pedestal for the sword and warded it just as heavily as Albus had warded his drawer full of socks. Then the green-eyed man sighed and sat down. Salazar was off sulking somewhere and wasn't talking to him because he had killed his beloved, _little_ basilisk. Harry secretly thought that the Slytherin Founder and Hagrid would become best buddies if they ever met. Now that was a scary thought. 

Harry shuddered and looked over to the Potion Master. The man was quietly looking around the Chamber, implanting every single detail in his brain for later use. Before they had cleared the dead basilisks body away, he had filled several vials and beakers with the surprisingly fresh blood for some later research. 

Harry had to keep himself for rolling his eyes at that one. The man was in love with his work, and the ex-Gryffindor highly doubted the man could love anyone anymore. Perhaps when he had been younger Severus still had had a chance at happiness, but not after so many years of being alone. 

He shook his head and stood up; he had to find Godric, before the ghost got himself into even more trouble. Harry suspected that being dead for so long had made the Four Founders slightly crazy, and that was why they acted like children most of the time. However, when he had asked if this was the case, he had gotten one hell of a tongue lashing from Rowena and after that had just accepted it as one of those unexplainable things. 

As he wandered off into the depths of the Chamber, he didn't notice the black eyes following his every move. 

-------------------------

Harry sighed for what seemed like the hundredth time that day. They had moved the Sword of Jeanne D'Arc into the Chamber two days ago. Hagrid had managed to provide them with a couple of Quintapeds, a Norwegian Ridgeback he swore was Norbert and – to everyone's surprise and horror – two Lethifolds. They'd had had to use several Shrinking Charms on the Dragon to get him into the Chamber, and _then _had had to put up wards to keep the animals from eating each other and to keep the Lethifolds from escaping. It came as no surprise when – at the next staff meeting – no one volunteered to take the first check-up trip into the Chamber at the end of the month. 

But it wasn't that that was worrying him the most right now. No, it was the fact that the students were returning and would walk through the doors of the Great Hall within the next fifteen minutes. 

This was his real test. Would he manage to keep up the pretence with the students there? Would anyone see through his act? And where the hell had Godric and Salazar disappeared off to? 

To keep his mind from going into shock, Harry turned to the Professor sitting next to him who just happened to be Thomas Molloy. "Really Thomas, there's no need to look so scared," he said, comforting the DADA Teacher as well as himself. "I admit that some of the students can be… _difficult _at times, but there's nothing to it really. May I offer you a Lemon Drop?" he took out a bag of the yellow sweets from a hidden pocket. 

 "No thank you Headmaster," Molloy looked nervously around. "I don't think anything can help me right now."  

 "You'll get used to it soon my boy," Harry patted the other man's hand gently. "Ah, here they come," he said as the doors of the Great Hall swung open and the students entered. To Harry it seemed like the Gates of Hell had just opened, and Snape seemed to share his thoughts because he glared even more fiercely at every student than ever before. 

Soon the children had sat down and Minerva entered with the first years. She explained about the Sorting Hat and what it would do, and several first years looked relieved. Then she started calling out names. Harry clapped politely when a child was Sorted, but he dreaded the start of term notices that he would have to deliver in a couple of minutes. 

Finally the Sorting was over and he stood up. Every head in the Great Hall turned to watch him. 

 "Welcome to another school year," Harry began, proud of himself for keeping his voice from shaking. "As usual there's the notice about the Forbidden Forest being just what its name hints it to, and all of you would do well to remember that. Also, Mr Filch has added several new products from the _Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes_ to his list of forbidden artefacts." Minerva coughed pointedly. "Ah, yes, I have the delighting pleasure of introducing you to your new Defence Against the Dark Arts Teacher, Thomas Molloy. Please give him a big hand everyone." The students clapped politely. "And now only a couple of more words from me: We know what we are, but not what we will become. Thank you and tuck in!" Harry clapped his hands twice and the feast started. 

Thomas Molloy looked much more at ease and was chatting with Sprout about the school and her beloved plants. 

 "Maybe I can come around some time and you can show me what to do?" the new Professor suggested. "I really have no clue when it comes to plants, and would be honoured if you'd teach me." 

Sprout blushed. "Of course I will," she said. "Come around on a Hogsmeade Weekend, or when neither of use have papers to grade, and we'll see what we can do about it." 

Minerva leaned over and whispered in Harry's ear: "He's charmed her, and the rest of the Teachers, into the palm of his hand. Something is definitely up here."

 "Hmm, you could be right, but until further notice lets leave it be." Harry replied and she nodded. Severus caught Harry's eye and raised an eyebrow. Harry signalled to him that he'd tell him later after the feast.  

The rest of the night went on normally, except for the fact that Salazar and Godric were still missing, something that would make the bravest of men shake in his boots. There was no telling what the two ghosts had gotten into this time, and to tell the truth Harry wasn't sure he wanted to know. 

~*~*~*~*------*------*~*~*~*~

There, done. Please tell me what you think.

-------------------------

[1.]_Brakylogia tis Lakonike_: Speaking shortly and straight to the point. Comes from Lakonia in Greece where children were raised to speak shortly and straight to the point. 

-------------------------

Thanks to: 

athenakitty, Dragonhope, Arizosa, anon, Green Dragon UK, Fage of Hyren, Dark-past, chaser, Zaeria, Irish Angel, Lexi-formerly Katy999, Lukaret, serapotter, Nienna Ciryatan, SSSroaB, Ruskbyte, Lokia, mcnugget, Lady Phoenix Gryffindor, CatatonicReaction and MJ. 


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I own only the obvious, the rest belongs to JK Rowling.

Authors Note: Thank you for all the wonderful reviews. And thank to my wonderful betas _Tabitha_ and _Lexi-formerly Katy999_.

-Chapter Four-

 "So, what was it that you and Minerva talked about during the feast?" Severus asked Harry as they made their way towards the Headmaster's office for a meeting with the Order.

 "She was just pointing out that Thomas Molloy is a bit too charming for her peace of mind." Harry replied. 

 "Yes, I have noticed that as well," The Slytherin Head of House admitted. "Binns was boring us all to death just yesterday, with Thomas this and Thomas that." 

Harry frowned. "Either that man is going to try to take the sword or he has a wish to be bored to death. I can't figure out which." 

 "I'm going to have a few trustworthy Slytherins keep an eye on him." Severus had no qualms about telling Harry that he had students from his house watch other students and teachers. The young man was the only one who could completely understand why he did it; last time he had brought it up with Minerva, Albus and the other teachers, the rest of them had nearly bit his head off with accusations. 

 "And perhaps a ghost or two as well?" Harry suggested. "Is Dobby still working here?"

 "It's impossible to get rid of that little menace."

 "Good, we might as well employ the House Elves as well. They're cleaning everything, right, so no one will blame them if certain information got into my or yours hands. A gust of wind could have blown the piece of paper out of the room, or someone walked in on them while they were cleaning." Harry sighed theatrically. "There's really so much that could happen." 

Severus was eyeing him in amusement. "Indeed," the taller man muttered and smirked. Harry smirked right along, his eyes flashing with mischief. Once a Slytherin, always a Slytherin, and they both knew that the poor guy didn't have a chance in hell with the two of them plotting against him. 

The gargoyle guarding the entrance to the Headmasters office jumped away when Harry said the password and then neatly jumped back in place after trying to trip Severus. The tall man was used to this however, and easily avoided the stuck-out leg. Every single one of Albus' possessions had attacked him at one point or other during his years as a Potion Master, and it hadn't taken long before Severus had fought fire with fire. Why did you think the Headmaster had warded his drawer full of socks so heavily? 

 "HARRY!!!!" Severus was forced to jump out of the way as several Weasleys and a Weasley-Granger attacked the young man, or they would have crashed right into him as well. As it was they crashed into the wall and managed not to fall down the stairs. 

 "Hey Ron. Herm. Fred. George. Um, could you let me breathe for a second?" Harry's voice was heard from somewhere in the pile of red and brown. 

 "Oh sorry!" Hermione was the first to let go and she dragged the Weasleys off. "Come now boys, let Harry breathe." 

Draco rolled his eyes at the back-slapping Weasley males, but stepped up to the Boy Who Lived and grinned. "About time you showed up again," he said, which, in Slytherin terms, meant that he was happy to see him.

Harry just rolled his eyes, but shook the offered hand. "And you must be Mundungus Fletcher, correct?" Harry asked, turning to the plump man that looked like someone's favourite uncle. 

 "Right you are, Mr Potter, and let me tell you how happy I am to have your help with this little… eh, incident." Mundungus smiled. "And call me Gus." 

 "If you call me Harry."  
  


 "A fair trade." Gus grinned.

 "If we could get on with the meeting now that all the mushy stuff is out of the way?" Severus growled. He hated it when people prolonged the introductions beyond stating their names.

 "Of course." Draco said and all of them entered the office again and took a seat by the fire. 

 "Tea anyone?" Hermione offered, as she was the only female there. McGonagall was keeping an eye on the rest of the staff and was unable to attend. "Biscuits?" she asked after having poured a cup for Draco and herself; they refused. 

 "Anything new on the Albus-hunt?" Harry asked. 

 "We went to check out his brother's place," Fred Weasley said. "The house is like a bloody maze! Just when you think you know where you are, it turns out you're at the exact opposite place." 

 "Yeah," the other twin spoke up. "It would surprise me if Albus got lost in that place, we nearly didn't make it out alive!" 

 "So that means you didn't find anything?" Draco concluded.

 "On the contrary, Draco, we found plenty but nothing that would be helpful to our case." Ron snickered at this and Gus coughed politely. 

 "Hermione, anything new?" Harry asked before it could escalate into a full out war.

Hermione shook her head. "Sorry, but I have nothing about Albus himself. Though I did hear that the new Headmaster from Durmstrang is gone, as well as Madame Maxime from Beauxbatons."

 "Any other schools?" Severus asked. 

 "Yes, I think my contact mentioned a couple from America, Canada and some others around China, Asia and Europe." 

 "Most likely it's connected with Albus' disappearance." Harry turned to the Potion Master. "Are you sure that it isn't some sort of Headmaster meeting or something?" he asked.

 "If it was, there would be news in the _Daily Prophet_ about it," the man replied. "And the board of governors would have told the teachers."

They spent another hour trying to figure out where the hell Albus had disappeared off to. When Fred and George said that the man had been abducted by sex-craving aliens, Harry decided to call it quits and sent the group home. He sighed as he closed the door after the last of them left. 

 "Ok, now that was disturbing." He muttered. 

 "Two words Potter: Weasley twins." Severus replied. Both of them shuddered. Even Fawkes looked sick. 

 "Gods, where do they come up with that stuff?" 

 "I'm more concerned where those four ghostly Founders have run off to. There hasn't been a peep from them the whole day." 

Harry quickly found the Marauders Map in one of his pockets and tapped it with his wand. "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good." The lines quickly ran all over the parchment and formed the Hogwarts layout. "Where's Rowena and Helga?" Harry asked tapping the parchment once again. 

 "There they are." Snape hung over his shoulder and pointed at the library. "But where's Gryffindor and Slytherin?" 

Harry asked the parchment. "Hey, they are heading towards Myrtle's bathroom-"

 "-with two ghosts that I have never seen." Severus finished. "Wait, one of them is Margaret Pole, the infamous Countess of Salisbury. And the other is Lady Jane Grey. What are two ghosts from the Tower of London doing here?" 

 "Perhaps they are friends with some ghosts here or something." Harry suggested. 

 "No, that can't be right. Albus has invited the ghosts from the Tower to Hogwarts numerous times, and they always refused. Said something about not wanting to associate with common ghosts or something like that." 

 "Weird, but you can hardly call Godric and Salazar common." Harry noted that the taller man hadn't moved from his position. 

 "You're probably right, but still…" the black eyes narrowed dangerously. "They're heading dangerously close to the sword, and you know that ghosts can sense magical things like that. You really want to take the chance of having the whole ghostly – and thereby the whole mortal – world know that the sword is here?" 

Harry thought over it then had to admit defeat. Snape was right. "Alright, you win. Fawkes!" the phoenix flew over to them. "Find any ghost possible – the Bloody Baron, Nearly Headless Nick, Rowena, the Grey Lady – I don't care who, just get them to Myrtle's bathroom as soon as possible." The bird nodded and disappeared in a flash of flames. 

 "That wasn't so hard, now was it, Potter?" 

 "If those ghosts were visiting friends and we ruined it, you're taking the blame." Harry growled and shut the door in the other man's face. 

Severus rolled his eyes and headed to the dungeons. Trust the Golden Boy to act completely innocent. 

-------------------------

It was official: Harry was bored to death. The students were in their classes and the teachers were teaching said classes, and Harry was walking around trying to find something to occupy his time with. Just what the hell did Headmasters do in their free time? Not all of it could be taken up by school-related business, now could it? 

 "I hate this." Harry muttered to himself. 

 "Hate what Headmaster?" inquired a voice from behind him.

Harry whirled around and stood face to face with Thomas Molloy. "Only the fact that I'm running out of Lemon Drops and, as you know, I am quite fond of those sweets. It really would be a shame if I- but lets not talk about an old man's sweet-tooth. Is there something I can help you with?" 

 "Yes, actually there is." The brown-haired man fell in step with Harry, careful not to tread on the colourful robes. "I was just wondering if it was true what they're saying. That the sword of Jeanne D'Arc is here at Hogwarts."

 "Ah, yes, that's true. You weren't on that particular meeting." Harry said happily, though inside he was getting more and more suspicious. "And, yes it's true. The sword is here at Hogwarts."

 "Thank you Headmaster." Molloy replied. "I am honoured that you would trust me with that kind of information." 

 "Think nothing of it, my boy." Harry replied, even more suspicious than before. "Now that the Dark Lord is gone," he continued choosing his words carefully to give the right image, "I feel that we must trust each other more than ever. It _is_ a complete secret, so, naturally, the whole school knows and it won't be long before the rest of the Wizarding world follows." 

 "Yes sir; if you'll excuse me, I have a class in fifteen minutes." It was politely said, but Harry could feel the eagerness to get out of Albus' presence in the young man. 

 "Of course – oh, and before you go, could I offer you a Lemon Drop?" Molloy declined politely and went on his way. "What are you planning?" Harry asked no one in particular as he gazed after the DADA Teacher with narrowed eyes.

Harry turned and continued to walk down the corridor; lost in his thoughts as he was, he didn't see the manically grinning poltergeist until he was soaked from top to bottom in sticky honey. 

 "Peeves!" Harry yelled angrily and tried to wipe the stuff away. Peeves himself was laughing so hard that he had forgotten to flee. It wasn't often that he had the chance to prank on the Headmaster and have said prank succeed. 

Suddenly Harry stopped cursing and yelling, and he turned to the floating ghost. "My dearest Peeves," he said in a sly voice. "How would you like to prank a certain professor and get away with it?"

 "Say what?" Peeves was all ears.

 "I want you to spy on Thomas Molloy for me," Harry explained, "totally in secret of course, and report to me or Professor Snape whatever you find out. And in return you'll be allowed to play as many pranks as you will on him without getting punished for it – but only on Molloy, though." 

The poltergeist thought over it for a moment, then grinned evilly. "Headdy-Masty, ol' Peeves'll make you proud." Peeves extended a hand and Harry let his go straight through it.

 "Then it's a deal." Now all he had to do was to find the other ghosts and explain the situation to them, he could even require the services of Moaning Myrtle. Harry grinned and tried to take a step. Something that proved difficult as the honey had somehow hardened and had glued him to the floor. He recognized it as the newest from the _Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes_: Cement Honey, guarantied to stiffen up and stick together anything. The wizard-version of super glue, and three times as strong. "PEEVES!!!!!!!"

-------------------------

A month went by quietly. Peeves reported every night to either Harry or Severus, and pulled as many pranks as possible on Molloy during the day. Rowena had managed to keep her fellow Founders invisible and quiet, and no one except a select few knew that the four ghosts were there at all. Neither had there been another sighting of Lady Jane Grey or the Countess of Salisbury. 

Harry had finally managed to figure out most of Albus' office, but there were certain parts of it that not even Rowena and Severus combined could understand. Like the one painting which changed all the time: one second it could show a magical waterfall, and in the next there would be a picture of Mona Lisa – and never did it show the same thing twice! 

Salazar was taking great delight in scaring unsuspecting Hufflepuffs by hissing in Parseltongue whenever they passed him. Godric had taken it upon himself to spread rumours around the school. His favourite was telling adventure-seeking students that there was a great treasure hidden away in the school, then putting out false leads and clues. Helga was still floating around flirting with every male ghost in the castle, and Rowena was trying to keep the other three from showing themselves to the public. 

Harry was happily sitting in Dumbledore's office, munching on a Sherbet Lemon and reading his manuscript for _The Phantom of the Opera_, when Severus and Minerva stormed through the door, arguing heatedly and completely ignoring him. 

Fawkes seemed to raise an eyebrow at the two Professors, then looked to Harry the look clearly stating: _they're human and therefore your problem_. 

Harry rolled his green eyes and turned back to the Heads of Houses. "Ahem, is there something I can help you with?" he asked.   

 "Severus just sent Peeves on the Countess of Salisbury!" the Head of Gryffindor exclaimed almost hysterically. "Now we'll never get another ghost from the Tower to visit us again!"

 "Will you shut up, woman, and let me explain!" Severus roared. "That bloody Countess is here for only one reason, and that's the Sword of Jeanne D'Arc!"

 "You are more paranoid than Mad-Eye Moody!"

 "And you're too naïve for your own good! If we couldn't get the ghosts here in the past, then there's certainly no way they are coming here on their own free will!"

 "Headmaster, are you going to allow this?!" McGonagall shrieked. 

Harry and Severus exchanged quick glances, silently agreeing to discuss this when the matter at hand was dealt with. 

 "My dear woman," Harry began carefully. "I'm afraid that in this matter I'm trusting Severus' instincts more than the desire to have some of the ghosts from the Tower of London on visit." 

 "Oh! You're both completely… _impossible_!" Minerva shook with fury before she stomped out and the door slammed shut after her. 

After a few seconds Harry changed back into himself and looked curiously at the closed door, his green eyes shining brightly with the challenge of a new mystery to solve. Severus was also watching the door, his expression the same as Harry's. Fawkes looked from one to the other, seemed to shrug and then adapted the same expression as the two humans. 

 "That was… interesting." Harry said finally.

 "Understatement of the year, Potter," the Potion Master replied. "Why did she call you 'Headmaster' when she knows what you are?"

 "And that show of anger is something new as well. The McGonagall I know wouldn't have blown up just because you sent Peeves after a ghost from the Tower." Harry sighed. "We're going to need help with this one. We already have to watch out for the ghosts from the Tower, the Sword of Jeanne D'Arc and have to watch Molloy as well."

 "Don't forget those bloody Founders." Severus reminded him. "And we have the Order searching for Albus fulltime. Who can we get to help us with this?" Harry grinned and raised his eyebrow in mock-imitation of the Potion Master himself. "Oh no. No. Never. Forget it right now, Potter. I am _not_ working with those two canines again!"

 "Come now Severus," Harry replied grinning. "It might even be interesting." 

 "My life is interesting enough thank you very much! Those two are going to prank the whole school at least twice before the week is out, and I have no intention of walking around with my hair pink or lime green."

 "Not to worry; and last time they did that, your hair turned red with yellow polka dots. It was over after two weeks. Nothing too bad." 

 "Your notion of 'bad' is broader than mine Potter – either that, or you really have no brain in that thick skull of yours." Severus growled. "And just imagine the havoc they'd be able to create if they ever got together with Gryffindor and Slytherin." 

 "You know what Snape," Harry said suddenly. Inspiration had struck like a bolt out of the blue. "I think you're afraid of Remus and Sirius."

The Slytherin Head of House sputtered, speechless for once. "_Afraid_?! Of those… those… those mongrels?! Are you crazy?! I'm not afraid of them!"

 "Shall I just send them an owl and ask them to come then?" the Boy Who Lived barely kept the triumphant smile off his face. 

 "Do that, in fact do it right now! I'll send the bloody bird off myself." 

While Harry wrote a short note to both Sirius and Remus, Severus went around the room grumbling all the time – Harry often caught something that sounded like: 'Afraid? Bah, humbug!'. 

The taller man snatched the letter from Harry's hands when the amused ex-Gryffindor turned around, and stormed off to the Owlery. Harry just shook his head and wondered how long it would take for the Potion Master to see past his anger and realise that he had been manipulated. 

Severus was on his way back to his dungeons – the owl sent off – when he realised he had been tricked. The word 'Potter' echoed off the walls throughout the castle and scared students and teachers alike. It even reached Professor Trelawney, who at once assumed that Harry was back at the school and hurried out of her tower to catch the young man and tell him his fate. 

-------------------------

Godric and Salazar were bored. They were so bored that they had sought out the others company to keep from going mad. Sure, scaring and tricking unsuspecting students was fun, but after a while the students stopped believing them and ignored them; some, mostly Slytherins, Ravenclaws and Gryffindors, even tried to hex them. 

Children these days really had no respect for their elders. 

 "Whose move is it?" Salazar asked, opened one lazy eye and looked at the ghostly chessboard and pieces that were floating between the two of them.

 "I dunno." Godric replied and yawned. "I'm bored."

 "Right now I'm too lazy to argue with you." 

 "It never was like this when we were alive." Godric continued. "We always had something to do back then."

 "What I can't understand is why Rowena and Helga don't want us to have any fun." The Slytherin Founder mumbled. "I mean, sure, the Countess of Salisbury isn't exactly young, but come on! They must've realised I was desperate if I wanted to walk around with a hag hanging off my arm."

 "I don't know, Lady Jane Grey was kind of cute." 

 "Cute and definitely too young for you. I really don't understand what she saw in you." 

 "I can give you several examples. My bravery. My charm. My handsome features-"

Salazar rolled his eyes. "You are one big idiot, you know that right? Even worse than Lockhart." He told his fellow Founder. 

 "And you are a paranoid snake-loving moron." Godric replied without missing a beat. Then he sighed. "I hate this. No one even batters an eyelash anymore when we argue. They have grown bored with it and know how to handle it. We really need something to do."

Salazar jumped up grinning like a madman. "You have just given me a brilliant idea, _and_ it would give the two of us something to do!"

 "Well, what is it then?"

 "It's ingenious!"

 "No, the idea. What is it?"

 "Magnificent, I tell you."

 "I don't want to know what it is, but _what_ it is. So what is it?"

 "Will you make up your mind! First you want to know, then you don't and now you do again. I'm going nuts!"

 "Just tell me what the idea is."

 "I told you already. It's brilliant, magnificent… did I miss something out here?"

 "Ingenious."

 "Thank you. It's brilliant, magnificent and ingenious!" 

 "And he who had so good recommendations." Godric muttered while hitting his head on the wall repeatedly. 

 "Oi, I know this one! It's from _Pocahontas_, right?!"

 "Will you just bloody well tell me what the idea is about before I kill you!?!" Gryffindor exclaimed waving his arms around like a windmill. 

 "Well, things certainly just got chillier here." Salazar grumbled.

 "And that line's from _Ice Age_, now will you get on with it?!"

 "Alright, alright, no need to fly off the handle here." He threw an arm around the other ghost's shoulder in a conspiring way. "Ok, this is the plan. We act nice to each other in public. It will sure as hell confuse them out of their wits."

Godric looked at him as if he had grown another head. "All this arguing for… _that_?"

 "Yeah, I know, isn't it a wonderful idea?"

 "Are you crazy?"

 "Who isn't?" 

 "No."

 "Why not?"

 "It'll never work."

 "Why not?"  
  


 "We're going up against Helga, Rowena, Minerva and Severus here. Not to mention Harry. All of them are very, _very_ smart people." 

 "Since when did you become the voice of reason?"

 "Since you lost yours," Godric replied. "And get your hand off my shoulders." 

 "I thought you were the one who jumped into things without looking." Salazar shot back.

 "Yeah, well, I've been hanging around the three of you for _way_ too long."

 "So now you're going to leave us as well?!"

 "You really are a paranoid git."

 "Oh yeah? You're a-"

 "POTTER!!!!" Salazar and Godric looked at each other then hurriedly stuck their heads through the door to see what was going on.

Severus Snape had cornered Harry – who was in his normal shape – and had the other man at wand point. 

 "Anything I can do for you, Severus?" Harry asked. 

 "Stop manipulating me around!"

 "Oh, that, well, would you have agreed without me having to do it?" Snape shook his head, too angry to reply. "Then there is your answer. Good day." Harry smirked and walked off. The Potion Master stared after his retreating back for a while before stalking off to his own rooms.

Godric and Salazar looked at each other again, similar evil grins on both of their faces. Something that never bode good for anyone involved.                

~*~*~*~*------*------*~*~*~*~

There! Done! Please review and tell me what you think.

Also, my oral exams are up in a weeks time and I don't have much time to write. So please be patient.

Thanks to:

ShadowSnape, Fin-Phoenix, MJ, AtieJen, Crab Apple Fairy, SlytherinAtHeart, Angel of Death, Makota, chaser, aziandorkess, Demoness Yasha, Arizosa, Zaeria, Redtaillia, CatatonicReaction, Dragonhope, athenakitty, VB, Lyla Snape, Samantha, Miranda Flairgold, Jiltanith, Silver_Youkai and Liz.   


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I own only the obvious, the rest belongs to JK Rowling.

Authors Note: I know this chapter may seem weird and/or boring, but bear with it mates, it's important. I have no idea when the next chapter may be out. School is starting soon and the next couple of weeks will be hectic.

Authors Note2: Thanks to my wonderful betas _Tabitha_ and _Lexi formerly Katy999_. 

Authors Note3: This is the un-betaed version. The correct will be up as soon as my betas are done. 

-Chapter Five-

Dear Albus,

Are you sure this is a good idea? Not that I don't trust you, but your plans generally go wrong, you know.

Your accomplice,

    T. M.

-------------------------

_Albus,_

_We cannot fail this time, and you know it. _

_I hope that your plan works this time, you old coot, or else this is the last time I'm joining something as crazy as this._

_By the way, how is it going with the other plan? Any progress yet?_

_Owl me soon,_

_  M. O. M._

-------------------------

My dearest brother,

Come to my house as fast as possible. 

There are two reasons for this invitation:

1) We need to discuss your newest plan

2) I need your help on one of my projects

Your dear brother,

   A. Dumbledore.

-------------------------

_Diary,_

_I swear to have my revenge on that blasted Albus Dumbledore once and for all. _

_This time I'm going to be the victor._

_Yao Li_

-------------------------

Thomas Molloy (or whatever you call yourself this time),

I suspect you know that the Sword of Jeanne D'Arc is being moved to Hogwarts. As all who have read the paper know, this Sword has great magical potential. However, nor those fools at the Ministry nor that Muggle-loving fool Albus Dumbledore, know how to exploit that power – but I do, and I want that Sword.

So this is your mission: get me the Sword of Jeanne D'Arc no matter what the cost. If you have to kill half of Hogwarts to get it, then do it! 

I'll pay you when you give me that Sword.

Your employer,

      A. D. 

-------------------------

_Agent 48,_

_We have just received word that A. D. is planning to steal the Sword of Jeanne D'Arc, which is currently stationed at Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry. _

_What you have to do is to disguise yourself as a Professor, and protect the Sword with your life. I cannot stress the importance of this mission enough, Agent. Try not to reveal your true identity, and watch out for Peeves the Poltergeist. _

_Agent 006._

-------------------------

Daily Prophet, 16th of September 

CHINESE HEADMASTER DEAD

The Headmaster of the Chinese Academy of Magic, Yao Li, was found dead yesterday in a hotel room in Transylvania. 

The cause of death is still unknown, as is the reason why Mr Li was there at all. 

More news (hopefully) in tomorrows paper.

Special correspondent,

    W. Riter

~*~*~*~*------*------*~*~*~*~

I know it's short, but please review. 

Thanks to:

Athenakitty, Hevensdevil, SlytherinAtHeart, Marie, Honor, chaser1, Grey Malwell, Morgana3, smilez, SSSRoaB, azerty, Fin-Phoenix, Kit, Illucia, ccs rox, Dragonhope, Nilborid, Jay, yumi-no-baka, Lady FoxFire, Kenny, Cloudburst2000, Jess16, Silver_Youkai, IncubusSuccubus, Verdenia and zimagesto. 


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: I own only the obvious, the rest belongs to JK Rowling.

Authors Note: Sorry for the long wait. Thanks for the reviews and enjoy this chapter as well. 

And thanks to my beta and good friend Paladin Steelbreaker. 

-Chapter Six-

"So, let's get this strait, you didn't find anything?"

"Nope."

"Abso-bloody-lutely nothing to give us a clue as to where Albus is?" Harry sighed.

"Abso-bloody-lutely no-"

"No, wait, there was something weird there," Fred cut his twin off. "Remember that thing in the living room?"

"Oh, yeah!" George exclaimed then turned to Harry and Severus. "Actually we did find something!"

Severus looked ready to kill. "I give you five minutes to explain yourselves before I use your entrails in a potion!"

Harry sighed and shook his head. The Order of the Phoenix was having another meeting, and Fred and George had once again visited Aberforth Dumbledore asking if he had heard something from his brother. Aberforth had asked them what brother they were talking about. Shortly said they still hadn't found Albus and the Headmaster had been missing for over a month. 

"Alright, have a seat, this is going to take time!"

"No it's not going to take time, Weasley!" the Head of Slytherin growled.

"This is _not_ going to take time, mates, so sit down!" George quickly corrected himself. "Right, Fred and I were sitting in the living room when I saw-"

"_You_ saw?!"

"Yes, _I_ saw."

"You did not, George! It was I who…" both twins covered under the murderous glares from the other occupants in the room. "You saw, George!"

"No, it was you."  
  

"Nope, definitely you!"

Harry was beginning to loose his patience. "Will you two get on with the story and argue in your spare time?!" 

"Wonderful idea!"

"Yep, never heard something better!"

"Then get on with it!" the whole room hollered as one.

Fred and George sent everyone sheepish looks. "Sorry, it's a twin thing."

"Anyways, on the mantle there was a certificate. That's not so weird in its own, but this one had a picture of two golden wool socks."

"And beside the certificate there was a cup formed as two socks, and the words: _'Aberforth Dumbledore, 2nd place 1920'_." 

"And…?" Draco pushed on after a while in silence. "That's all?"

Fred and George nodded proudly. 

"All this for nothing!" Severus buried his head in his hands.

"Are you sure there was nothing else?" Hermione asked tiredly and looked at Ron who was snoring slightly.

"As sure as the fact that Snape wants to kill us right now." 

And indeed it looked like the Potion Master was going to kill the twins. He was glaring Shrieking Death at them and his hand was going for his wand. Fred and George looked at each other, then jumped up and ran out of the room screaming like girls. The rest of the room blinked in surprise. They could still hear the twins screaming as the two redheads headed towards Hogsmeade. 

"That was weird." Harry said.

"More than weird," Severus agreed. "But it is the Weasley twins we're talking about."

"Still…"

-------------------------

They were sitting in the Headmasters office. The room was completely silent, which was weird as both Godric and Salazar were there. As to why the others were silent it was because they were too occupied staring at the two silent ghosts. Rowena was trying hard not to stare too much, but her eyes were constantly drawn to Slytherin and Gryffindor. Helga was openly gaping. Severus had a teacup halfway raised to his lips and Harry's hand was stuck in the bowl filled with Sherbet Lemon's. 

"Want a cup of Tea, Godric?" Salazar asked politely holding up a ghost-mug.

"What a splendid idea, Salazar. Would you be so kind to pour it for me? Thank you."

"My pleasure," the Slytherin Founder put the mug away. "My, it really is quiet in this room."

"Indeed."

Harry and Severus looked worriedly at each other, then shared a look with Rowena. All three of them were thinking the same thing: _'This can _not _be good_.'

Harry cleared his throat. "How… how about we get down to business? The first check up on the Chamber of Secrets needs to be arranged, we need to keep an eye at Minerva, and get the latest reports about Molloy."

"Why do we need to keep an eye at Minerva of all people?" Rowena asked surprised.

"She's been acting weird lately," the green-eyed young man replied. "Any news on the ghosts from the Tower?"

The Ravenclaw Founder sighed. "Nothing, when they saw me approaching they disappeared like _that_," she snapped her fingers to emphasize her point.  

"That only proves that they're up to something. The question is what?"

"What about Hermione?" Helga asked. "Has she found out something new about those Headmasters that disappeared?"

"Nothing yet, but she's working on it. Some good news might be that Sirius and Remus are coming at the end of the week."

"Speak for yourself, Potter." Severus growled. "I'm warning you though, if that mangy mutt even _thinks_ the word mischief, I'll personally hex him from here to hell!" 

"Wasn't expecting anything else form you, Severus." Harry replied, his eyes twinkling in amusement. "Rowena, since you're always interested in learning new things, how about you keep an eye at Minerva for us? Ask her questions that only she would know the answer to, like what year did Albus go completely batty on her, and so on." 

"I'm already at it!" Rowena sent one last look at the quiet Godric and Salazar before disappearing. 

"And you Helga, you can keep an eye out for ghosts from the Tower." 

"You got it!" Helga disappeared as well.

"You do know that she's going to flirt with Nicholas and the Baron, right?" Severus looked at Harry.

"I do, everyone does." He leaned closer to the Potion Master. "Wanna check if those two really are as good friends a they pretend to be?"

A truly evil smirk spread over the older man's face. "What did you have in mind, Potter?" 

Harry's eyes gleamed.

-------------------------

"I'm going to kill you Salazar!" Godric yelled and clung onto a pillar. "Get away! Go bother that bloody idiot over there!" he made shooing movements towards Slytherin who was hanging on to another pillar. 

"Shut up Gryffindor," Salazar growled. "Lets just check up on the sword and get out of here before these Lethifolds get a hold of us."

"I'm not worried about those, I'm worried about Norbert!" Godric glared at the Norwegian Ridgeback that was eying him hungrily. "Ready?" 

"To go to my doom? No, but we have no choice." Slytherin took a deep breath. "NOW!"

They let go of the pillars and ran towards the Sword that was placed almost in the middle of the room. Ducking under tails, jumping over Quintapeds, skidding and jumping over Lethifolds, the two Founders finally reached the Sword of Jeanne D'Arc. Nearly there, Godric tripped and Salazar tripped on him again. Both fell towards the Sword and went straight through Sword and pedestal. 

"Oi, we're ghosts!" Godric exclaimed in wonder looking at his ghostly hand. "Cool!"

Salazar rolled his eyes. "How stupid can you be?! We've been ghosts for the last thousand years, idiot!"

"Oh, yeah, then why did we go through all that trouble getting here when the animals can't hurt us?"

"… I've no idea."

"Wait until Harry and Rowena hear about this."

"Yeah, they won't let us forget it." Salazar stood up. "Now lets get back and report to Severus that everything's shipshape."

-------------------------

Severus was annoyed, yeah, more than annoyed, he was down right pissed off. He had just spent the last two hours listening to a House-Elf tell him about everything they had found in Molloy's room. Potter really needed to learn how to define his orders to those creatures, because Severus was _not_ going to spend another two hours listening to every particle of dust that had been dusted away. Luckily it was time for dinner, and he could glare at everyone to his hearts delight. 

Just as he entered the Entrance Hall the great oak doors opened. The Potion Master didn't think much of it, at least not until he was attacked and sent to the ground by a huge grim-like dog. 

The dog continued into the Great Hall without beating an eye and Severus was left on the ground trying to get his breath back.

A shadow fell over him and he glared up at the man. "There, there, Severus. That wasn't so bad, now was it?" 

"Shut up Lupin," he refused to take the man's outstretched hand and got up. "Lets get things clear right away. If that mutt even sets one paw in my dungeons, I'll use him in your next Wolfsbane Potion." 

Lupin just laughed, then he spotted someone behind Severus. "Headmaster!"

"Hello Remus," Potter said, eyes twinkling. Then he turned to the taller man. "Severus, why are you covered in drool? Don't tell me you forgot to wash up after working on your potions." 

"Please, Headmaster, be so kind and _shut up_!" 

"Now, now, Severus, there's no need to become defensive." Potter and Lupin went into the Great Hall, leaving a fuming Snape in their wake. 

_'This is going to be hell on earth!'_ the Head of Slytherin thought as he cast a quick Cleaning Charm on himself. _'Gods help us all!'_

~*~*~*~*------*------*~*~*~*~

There, done. I know it's short, but I'm currently having a bit of a Block on this story. If anyone has ideas as to what could happen, please send them to me.

Thanks to:

athenakitty, yumi-no-baka, Arizosa, shitsumon, Crystallina Potter, Kateri1, chaser1, SSSoaB, Terra4, Kangaroo, Jay, Care-Bear in a Leather Jacket, Elessar, Miranda Flairgold, harryforeva, PhoenixPadfoot89, Jess16 and Acyla. 

And as to what part socks play in this story, well, put it this way: WITHOUT THE SOCKS THERE WOULD BE NO STORY.      


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I own nothing but the obvious, the rest belongs to JK Rowling.

Authors Note: Sorry for the absence, but I lost inspiration on this story for a while. However, now I'm back with this chapter. Enjoy!

PS: this is not beta-ed as my beta doesn't do Slash stories. Sorry.

-Chapter Seven-

Harry totally enjoyed watching the pissed-off Potion Master stalk into the Great Hall. Snape was glaring left and right and growled when he passed the Hufflepuff table, causing several first-years to squeak and hide under the table or hang onto older students. Said older students didn't look too happy themselves and hung onto even older students. Nothing unusual there.

"Headmaster," Severus growled quietly as he sat down. "We are going to have a long chat about certain things once dinner is over."

"I am afraid it will have to wait, my dear Potion Master," Harry replied, his grin hidden by the beard, though the whiskers twitched portraying his amusement.

"Why, pray tell, does it have to wait?"

"We have to explain the entire situation to Remus and Sirius, and that is going to take time. After that I have a very important meeting with my bed, and I fully intend to have a good nights sleep for once."

Severus' hand twitched after his wand, but he managed to not hex the shape-shifter next to him. "I really do hate you sometimes, you do know that? Even more than Dumbledore himself."

"I'll take that as a compliment." The blue eyes twinkled, and Harry turned to Remus who was sitting in Minerva's usual seat. Then it hit him that it was weird and slightly worrisome that the Transfiguration Professor was not at the Head Table; as far as Harry knew the woman was like clockwork and hadn't missed a dinner in the Great Hall since Voldemort's last rise to power. "Interesting." He mumbled quietly to himself.

However, Remus heard it due to his werewolf hearing. "What is interesting, Headmaster?"

Harry quickly replied. "All in due time, Remus, all in due time. Could I ask yourself and Sirius to come to my office after dinner, or are you tired after the journey here?"

"Oh no, Headmaster, we'll be there right after dinner. What's the password?"  
 

"Flying Fish."

"A new candy?"

"Indeed and it is really good. Makes you painlessly grow wings and you can fly around for about five minutes before the wings fall off. Wonderful things all around."

"Indeed." Remus blinked and surreptitiously edged away from the seemingly insane headmaster.

Harry, however, wasn't paying attention and had turned back to Severus the second he was finished with taking a bite from his chicken. "Severus, that talk of ours seems to have rescheduled, we need to talk as soon as we're finished with explaining everything to Remus and Sirius."

Severus stared at the fake headmaster for a second then nodded. "So, you finally noticed that Minerva's not here as well? And let me point out that our newest Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher seems to have disappeared as well."

"Coincidence? I think not." Harry agreed then both went back to their respective dinners.

-------------------------

"So, what did you need to talk to us about, Headmaster?" Remus asked.

"Yeah, and why's tall, dark and greasy here?" Sirius added and glared at the Potion Master.

Harry sighed and slumped in the chair behind the headmaster desk. "Sit down, stop glaring and we'll explain." He said tiredly. Fawkes flew over to him, settled on his shoulder and opened his beak to sing. At least that's what Harry thought he would do, but contrary to his belief the phoenix didn't sing. The bird looked highly dignified and then simply pecked Harry on the head like a woodpecker. And not gently either.

"Stop that, Fawkes!" Harry growled and tried to bat the phoenix away without any luck. He was, by now, quite convinced that both the phoenix and Dumbledore were off their rockers.

Sirius and Remus stared with wide eyes at the spectacle in front of them, and Severus was having a hard time trying to cover his laugh.

"What is going on?" Sirius asked hesitantly seemingly afraid of the answer.

"What makes you think that there's something going on, mutt?" Snape sneered.

 "Albus and Fawkes have always been the best of friends as long as I've known him," the animagus replied.

"And Albus didn't offer us his usual sherbet lemon once we sat down." Remus butted in.

Harry yelped and tried to keep the phoenix from pecking a hole in his head. "Just tell them Severus! AAAAAAAHHHH!!!! STOP THAT YOU BLOODY PIGEON!!!!"

"Did the Headmaster just swear?" Sirius asked, his eyes wide.

Severus rolled his eyes. "No, the Headmaster did not swear because, gentlemen, that is not the Headmaster."

Harry took that as his cue and turned back into himself. Fawkes chirped happily and flew back to his perch and began preening his feathers as if nothing at all had happened. Harry glared at the fowl continuously muttering something about pigeons, roasted chickens and insane people with insane pets. When the green-eyes man turned back he found both Sirius and Remus blinking in shock upon seeing Harry there instead of Dumbledore.

Sirius was the first who put himself together. "Can someone explain to me why my godson is impersonating our esteemed and insane headmaster?"

Harry sighed and, with help from Severus, told them the entire tale. They left nothing out, not about Minerva's rather odd behaviour lately, nor the fact that Salazar and Godric seemed to be getting along for once.

And speak of the sun! At that moment Rowena came flying through the door panting slightly.

"Anything we can help you with, Rowena?" Harry asked curiously.

The Founder shook her head. "No, no, nothing at all, but I need to speak with you as soon as possible."

"Now would be a good time."  
 

"No it wouldn't. Godric told me that Salazar told him that the Bloody Baron told him that Filch said that he saw Minerva McGonagall and Thomas Molloy having a duel in the dungeons, and they were _not_ debating upon starting a Duelling Club."

Harry and Severus shared pointed looks. Remus looked thoughtful and Sirius looked slightly confused still trying to connect who told who to tell who about McGonagall and this Folly-chap or whatever his name was.

"Harry," the werewolf began. "Why don't we just allow 'Minerva' to come up here and see how she tackles the fact that there are two dogs here who can sniff her out, excuse the pun – actually, don't excuse it."

"That was a bad joke."  
 

"Shut it."

Severus mulled over it for a minute, then was forced to admit that the werewolf had a point. "It sounds like the only plan we have for now, as much as I hate to admit it. Rowena, peek outside and tell us when McGonagall reaches the gargoyle."  
 

The ghost nodded and huffed. "Really, who'd have thought that a small thing as playing Albus could have turned into such an insane mystery?"

"We ask ourselves the very same thing," Harry told her and changed into Albus. He rubbed his now-blue eyes, adjusted the half-moon spectacles and cleared his throat. "This is whole thing is coming out of hand."

The Potion Master nodded. "When this is over I am taking a long holiday, everything else be damned."

Remus, on the other hand, grinned. "I think it is rather exciting. Now, Severus and Sirius, you two start a row about something or other as soon as Rowena says that McGonagall's on her way up. Got to make this look and sound good, right?"

"He's right," the impersonated Albus Dumbledore said. "But please refrain from using too nasty hexes – actually, don't use magic at all, comprende?" 

"Yes, sir," Sirius replied automatically, then realised just _who_ he was talking to and scowled. "Ugh, this is disturbing."

Suddenly Rowena's head popped through the wooden door. It was quickly followed by her body. "Alright, she's on her way up."

"Right, you two might as well start now." Remus grinned happily and eagerly watched the two men waiting to see who would make the first move.

Severus and Sirius looked each other up and down, both trying to find something insulting to say. It was surprisingly difficult to come up with a good insult when you were forced to fight, otherwise it just rolled off of them like water.

"Oh, I know!" Sirius exclaimed and grinned evilly. "There's one word which gets a rise out of Snape faster than anything else."  
 

"Oh no! Don't you even DARE to think about that!" Severus growled.

The other man looked like Christmas had come early. "Shall I disclose this information?"

"Yeah, go right ahead!" Harry said eagerly.

The others turned to him.

"You aren't supposed to take sides, you know."

"Yes, as headmaster such things are completely forbidden to you."

Harry waved a hand carelessly. "Details, details! Now hurry up you two!"

"Right!" Sirius grinned evilly. "Snivellus!"

Harry blinked and looked confusedly over at Remus. "Snivellus?"

Remus nodded happily. "Snivellus!"

"I AM GOING TO KILL YOU, BLACK!!!!!" Severus roared and whipped out his wand. On second thought he threw it away, jumped at Sirius with a ferocious growl and grabbed the other man's neck and started squeezing.

The Boy-Who-Lived-to-turn-into-his-insane-headmaster decided that this was a good time to interfere. "Now, now, gentlemen, calm down."

"Severus! Release your grip, Sirius is turning blue!" Remus demanded.

"It is illegal to kill an innocent ex-con, Severus Snape, even in the Wizarding world."

"Oh dear!" McGonagall's voice from the doorway stopped the entire thing. "What is going on here?!" the woman demanded.

Severus hurriedly got off Sirius, picked up his wand and leaned against the windowsill with a scowl on his face. Sirius gulped air down like a goldfish on land, and wheezed trying to say something. Remus waved his wand and calmed the other man down, then made a show out of glaring at the Slytherin Head of House who glared straight back.

"Headmaster, what happened?!" McGonagall demanded again.

"The same thing that happens every time Mr Black and Mr Snape are in the same room," Harry replied and shot reprimanding glances to the two men involved. Then he focused on the woman in front of him. "Anything I can help you with, Minerva?"

"Yes, there is, you can fire Mr Molloy on the spot!"

"Why?"

"Why?! WHY?! That… that… that _fiend_ is not who he pretends to be!" the woman ranted. "For all we know he could be one of Voldemort's agents!"

Harry sighed. "What has he done?"

"He… he… he-"

"He is a good teacher, he is liked by both the students and the teachers, he knows his stuff very well; frankly, Minerva, I see no reason to fire him – actually, I think I'll offer him to stay as our DADA Professor permanently."

"WHAT?!" the woman shrieked. "HE'S A MONSTER!!!"

"Remus here is a monster once a month as well, but he was still one of the best DADA teachers we've ever had." Harry said, intentionally mentioning the fact that Remus was a werewolf.

McGonagall paled. "Wha…?" then she quickly shook herself. "Right, right, you're right again Headmaster. Good day." With that she quickly strode from the office and the door banged shut after her.

They waited for a few minutes to make sure she was gone before saying anything.

"Well?" Severus looked at Remus with a raised eyebrow.

Remus grinned. "She is an impostor."  

------------

Well, what do you think?

Thank to: 

athenakitty, chaser1, Devonny Rose, Mblack-Sirius' Secret Lover, SlytherinAtHeart, elle, Lyla Snape, Arizosa, Els-chan, kangaroo, Fortissimo, Clazzypops, Tor Walker, insanechildfanfic, MedNar, SSSRoaB, PhoenixPadfoot89, Jess16, Modesty and Madison Twins, Luna Negra, Dragonhope, Wynjara, Aconite, Serpent of Light, Ms. Padfoot, The Lady Reaper of the Shadows, HecateDeMort, Wolflady, anonymous and bladea.  


	8. Chapter 8

Of Headmasters and Socks

Disclaimer: I own nothing but the obvious, the rest belongs to JK Rowling.

Authors Note: Well, here's the next chapter. Enjoy!

-Chapter Eight-

Harry sighed and settled down for a good night's sleep still in the form of Albus Dumbledore.

After he, Severus, Sirius and Remus had made sure that the McGonagall currently running around the castle wasn't the McGonagall she was supposed to be, they had decided not to do anything yet except from keeping a good eye on both her and Molloy in the future. And with a little help from the Hogwarts ghost, that shouldn't be too difficult.

Harry had just started drifting off, when a yell from the adorning office nearly sent him falling off the bed. He jumped up, get himself loose from the blanket which seemed to have a life on its own and had decided to stick to him through thick and thin, and hurried into the Headmaster office.

There he was met with the sight of Godric and Salazar chasing each other. Or, better said, Godric was chasing Salazar who seemed totally freaked out for some reason.

When the Slytherin Founder spotted Harry in the doorway, he hurried over and hid behind the Boy Who Lived.

"Save me!" Salazar squeaked and ducked behind Harry.

Harry shook his head. "What happened this time?"

"He tried to molest me!"

"I did NOT!" Godric protested. "I don't swing that way. I was trying to get back my nightcap which is inconveniently placed on YOUR head."

"Don't listen to him Harry! He came to my room in the middle of the night and-"

"I DIDN'T MOLEST YOU!!!!"

"That's what they all say!" Slytherin replied.

"Jumping Jews of Jerusalem!" Godric threw his hands up.

"Now you want to molest the Jews as well?!"

Harry just stood there, half asleep, and was barely listening to the two arguing ghosts. On one hand he was relieved that Godric and Salazar were back to arguing about everything and nothing between heaven and hell, but on the other hand he was rather worried about the sanity of everyone in the castle with the things these two could drag into an argument.

"Why don't you two settle this without me?" Harry suggested and turned around to go back to sleep.

"You can't leave me alone here with this… this… this PERVERT!!!!" Salazar hollered right into Harry's ear.

"Shit, I'm deaf!"

Godric growled. "Pervert am I?"

"See, he admits it!!!!"

Harry had had enough. "Stop it, both of you or I'll call for Rowena."

Said female ghost came floating through the wall at that moment. "No need Harry," she bit out while glaring at the two male ghosts. "I think there were some demons in the ninth pit of hell that didn't hear these two." She advanced on the other two looking more like a lion than a raven.

Godric and Salazar looked at each other, gulped and were suddenly gone quickly followed by the Ravenclaw Founder who looked like she could murder everything and anything that stood in her way, be they ghost, human, or inanimate objects.

The shapeshifter rubbed his face tiredly and went back into the bedroom. Severus was right. There was no getting used to the insanity that bore the names Godric Gryffindor and Salazar Slytherin. Harry was just happy that Merlin had decided to stay in the ghost world, otherwise they would have all been totally insane by now.

------------

A new Order meeting was held the next day after dinner, and most people showed up except for Fred and George.

"Nothing to worry about Harry," Ron said, "they went back to Aberforth Dumbledore. I got a letter from them yesterday, apparently they have lost their way and their sense of direction due to the ever-changing house, so it might take some time before they find their way out again."

"But what about Aberforth Dumbledore himself?" Draco asked. "And his family? I mean, by now they should have noticed the fact that there are two insane redheaded twins running around in their home."

"That's the second thing I have to report," the redhead replied. "Apparently the entire family suddenly up and went last Saturday. The twins have no idea where they went, nor why they went wherever they went."

Harry sighed and wished for the hundredth time that Dumbledore was back with his usual insanity. This was all getting totally out of hand for them all. "Right, right, we'll have to track down Aberforth and his family. You can do that Mundungus. Hermione, anything new on the other heads of schools that disappeared?"

The bushy-haired woman took out a muggle notebook and a muggle pen, and leafed through. "Hmm… no, not really. Only that the Chinese Headmaster that went missing, Yao Li, has been found dead in a hotel-room in Transylvania yesterday. It was in today's Daily Prophet, but no one knows what he was doing there nor how he died."

"Interesting," Severus mumbled, then turned back to Harry. "What about you, Potter? Have you found anything worthwhile in the Headmaster's office, or did you just sit around and eat Lemon Drops all day?"

"Now that you mention it, I did find some letters…" Harry drew three letters from the back-pocket of his jeans.

Very tight jeans, as Severus couldn't help but notice. Very nice… the Potion Master shook himself and tuned in on the conversation again. By the way, to make things perfectly clear: he had NOT been admiring Potter's arse in those jeans.

"Now, the first letter here is from Aberforth, Albus' brother as we all know." Harry but the afire-mentioned letter on the table, and it was passed around so that everyone could read it. "My theory is that this 'newest plan' has something to do with the Sword of Jean D'Arc. As to whatever project that Aberforth has going – well, I honestly don't want to know."

"You don't think he's trying to mutate a goat again or whatever it was he was doing last time?" Sirius asked as he read through the letter.

"As Potter so nicely put it: we do not want to know!" Severus snapped and grabbed the letter, reading it quickly, before putting it back on the table. "What else did you find?"

Harry held up the second letter. "This is from someone that calls themselves M. O. M. This letter talks about two plans, one – I assume again – is referring to the Sword of Jean D'Arc, but the other I have no idea." The letter was passed around again.

"Who might this M. O. M. person be?"

"Haven't the foggiest clue."

"Maybe we should ask Trela-" Ron didn't get the chance to finish his sentence before he found both his mouth and his voice gone.

Harry and Severus stood with their wands drawn and a wild look in their eyes.

"Don't say it, Weasley!" Snape growled and slowly lowered his wand while looking around the room as if he expected Trelawney to jump out of the very walls. "Don't even THINK it." The man shuddered.

Harry, seeing the surprised and curious looks, explained. "She's been terrorising us the whole day, popping up all over the place trying to predict our deaths. It's scary."

Molly coughed politely. "Right, back to this M. O. M. person. Do you think it could be the Minister of Magic?"

"Nah, he delights in signing his name on letters, whether they are supposed to be secret or not," Mundungus replied. "Perhaps it stands for Mad-Eye Ogling Moody? What?! I heard the old badger was quite a pervert in his younger days. And I can't say I'm not jealous. Imagine what one could see with an eye like that! HEY!!!!" he protested as most people in the room hurt him in one way or another, the girls because he was being a pervert, and the boys because they had gotten rather bad mental images of Mad-Eye Moody.

"Gods, we're surrounded by perverts!" Harry groaned and Snape nodded in agreement.

Sighing, the Potion Master pinched the bridge of his nose. "The third letter?" he asked in a rather wary tone. This time he made sure to stand as far away from Mundungus and Ron as he could, which put him extremely close to Harry – a thing that brought with it it's own set of problems.

"There isn't much information to be taken from this letter," Harry replied. "It's written by someone with the initials T. M. and refers to yet another plan, saying something about Albus's plans generally going wrong."

"That's weird," Remus agreed and hung over Harry's shoulder to read the letter. "Perhaps the writer of this letter was your newest DADA teacher? Thomas Molloy or whatever his name was?"

"Could be possible, but I highly doubt it." Severus said hanging over Harry's shoulder as well. "But that is not his handwriting."

Suddenly Hermione jumped up, grabbed the three letters, looked at them and grinned before letting out a whoop of joy and jumping up and down. "I've figured it out! I know who these people are!"

"Wonderful, lets hear it then." Draco said and stopped trying to restore Ron's mouth and voice.

"The first letter is – as Harry said – Aberforth Dumbledore. The second letter was sent by Madame Olympe Maxime, the Headmistress of Beaouxbatons Academy in France. And the third letter was sent by Tristan Marshal, the Headmaster of Salem School for Witches and Wizards in America. And-"

"No, don't say it!" Sirius groaned.

"-they are two of the missing heads!" Hermione ploughed on as if she hadn't heard him.

"Perfect!" the animagus mumbled and let his head fall to the table with a THUMP.'

------------

There, what do you think? And finally some of the letters from chapter 5 come into play.

Thanks to:

Wolflady, ReginaLucifer, insanechildfanfic, Digi Bonds, athenakitty, S.Malfoy, The Lady Reaper of the Shadows, kangaroo, Prophetess of Hearts, Phoenixfeather6988, chaser1, Baroness Jumping Rain: Sidda, grand admiral chelli, Xyverz, Unseen Watcher, SSSRoaB, Luna Negra, Zoya, Riley Cat, Water Fire Girl, Nefertari Riddle and No Wood is not a stick.


	9. Chapter 9

**Of Headmasters and Socks**

**Disclaimer:** I own only the obvious, the rest belongs to JK Rowling.

**Authors Note:** Well, here's the next chapter. Enjoy!

-Chapter Nine-

"What did we do to deserve this insanity?" Harry groaned.

"I know I couple of things I've done, but I'm not so sure about you." Severus replied with a heavy sigh.

The two black-haired men were currently in the Headmaster office trying to get a few minutes of relaxation after the Order meeting and before throwing themselves into the insanity known as Hogwarts. Harry was in the form of the old Headmaster, and Severus was sprawled in his chair, grace and posture be damned. Fawkes was hungrily eyeing the chocolate-chip cookies that stood on the table between the two men.

"Once this is over I'm taking a loooooooong holiday," Harry declared a minute later. "I had to give up the 'Phantom of the Opera' for this, who knows if I'll ever get a break like that again. Albus owes me a big one after this."

"You're not the only one," the Potion Master grumbled. "If you're going on holiday, would you consider a travelling-partner? I hear that Hawaii is very nice."

Suddenly the mental image of Severus Snape in a crazy Hawaiian shirt, beige shorts, sandals and a straw-hat, standing on a beach with a drink in one hand, popped into Harry's head and he couldn't help but chuckle. A second later he was outright laughing. The Slytherin Head of House looked at him for a second, then seemed to catch on and smirked.

"Weird image," the older man admitted. "Makes me look like Albus in that shirt, huh?"

"Indeed, though you're welcome to come with me anytime. Fawkes!" Harry reprimanded the phoenix when he saw that all the chocolate-chip cookies were gone from the supposedly ever-filling plate. The fowl surreptitiously removed any crumbs from his beak, then sent a 'who, me?' look to the two wizards who were glaring at him.

Harry sighed and shook his head. "That phoenix is as insane as his owner."

"No need to tell me," Severus sent one last glare towards the phoenix, then picked up his now-cool cup of tea. "Any idea what we can do with McGonagall the Impostor?"

"Confront her about it?"

"Probably won't work."

"Veritaserum?"

"It takes a month to make, and I have none in stock."

"Kidnap her, tie her up, take her to the old Riddle house and brutally torture the truth out of her?"

"Cliché, but lets keep that in mind as a plan B."

"So what is plan A?"

"Wish I knew." The Slytherin replied. "Do you think Salazar and Godric might want to help us?"

Harry nodded. "Knowing them they won't pass it up. Why? Do you have a plan?"

"I do, but I'm worried they will start arguing and alert the entire world to our intentions."

"There is that." There was a short silence in the room, before Harry grinned. "It doesn't have to be a male ghost, now does it?"

Snape's black eyes glittered. "Who are you proposing then?"

Harry smirked.

------------

"No, absolutely not!"

"Come on, Helga," Harry begged. "You know you want to."

"I want to throw the fake McGonagall out of the school: yes, but I don't want to go poking around another woman's personal stuff!"

Severus sighed. The had been at this for an hour already. "But to throw the fake McGonagall out of the school we need evidence, and you're the last person – ghost or not – she would expect in her rooms. Besides, no one would ever think that the Founder of Hufflepuff House would sink so low."

"And I won't be sinking!" Helga protested.

"You'll personally get to throw the impostor out of Hogwarts." Harry tried to bribe the ghost.

"And flirt with whoever you want as long as they are dead." Severus quickly backed him up.

"Make Hufflepuff win the House Cup, and we have a deal." The ghostly woman said after a few minutes silence.

"The year is still young," Harry agreed. "Much can happen before summer vacation starts."

Helga sighed. "Alright, I'll be right back." With that she disappeared.

Severus sank into his chair again. "You do know that we can't help Hufflepuff win, don't you?"

Harry nodded and downed the rest of his tea. "And it's not even October yet. If it's like this every year, I have no idea how you survive."

"Neither do I. All I can thank the gods for is that Salazar and Godric are somewhere else and aren't bothering us."

"That's the only good thing about this situation."

The other man nodded. "Well, all we can do now is wait for Helga to return. Chess?"

"I claim black!"

"Being the Boy Who Lived I would have thought you would choose white."

"Nah, not really."

"Ok, chess."

"What?! On the fourth move?! Bloody hell, I'm screwed."

"That you are."

------------

Helga returned two hours later in the company of the other three Founders.

Severus and Harry who were on their 250th game of chess – 248 of those won by Severus – looked up when the four ghosts entered the office through the wall.

"Well?"

"What well?" Godric asked.

"There's a well somewhere?" Salazar looked around. "I don't see any well."

Rowena sighed. "There is no well. We didn't build any well for Hogwarts when we built the school."

"Then why did Severus say 'well'?" the Gryffindor Founder demanded. "Jumping Jews of Jerusalem!"

"Hey! Leave the poor Jews alone!" Salazar growled. "Isn't it enough you want to molest them?"

"I DON'T WANT TO MOLEST THE JEWS!!!!"

Rowena and Helga quickly showed the two male ghosts out of the room before the argument could get physical. Harry and Severus just watched the show without batting an eyelid, then Severus turned towards the shapeshifter and said, "Alright, you win. One does get used to those two fighting all the time."

Helga floated over to the two wizards and sat down in midair. "You two owe me big for this, you do know that, right?" they nodded. "Good, just checking."

"So, did you find anything at all?" Harry asked, then winced as Severus' queen blew his knight into smithereens.

"We did," Rowena replied and sat down beside Helga. "I met Helga on the way, and she told me what you two made her do, so I accompanied her to keep watch while she searched. Anyways, we found this letter." She handed the parchment to Severus. "Rather interesting, don't you think?"

"This A. D. person cannot be Albus or Aberforth, we know that much." Harry said after he read the letter himself.

Severus nodded in agreement. "Neither of them are insane enough to first hide the Sword, and then steal it. That's even beyond them." He looked closely at the letter again. "We know now that the Impostor-McGonagall doesn't want to steal the Sword, but to protect it; and she doesn't seem to like our dear DADA teacher either."

"Who are all these agents. 006 and 48? What kind of code-names are those?"

"Code-names only used by the Unspeakables." The Potion Master replied. He gave the letter back to Helga. "Please put it back where you found it, there's no need to watch over McGonagall anymore."

Harry felt as if a part of the weight had been removed. "Well, at least that's one thing we won't have to worry about anymore. What I am worrying about is where the real McGonagall might be."

There was a long silence in the room while Helga went and put the letter back where she had found it, then returned. As the Hufflepuff Founder sat down again and picked up her ghostly cup of tea, Rowena spoke up:

"Right, now we know that this A. D. person is after the Sword, which means he has an agent within these walls. An agent who is ready to apparently kill to get to the Sword, if this duel between impostor-McGonagall and Molloy was anything to go by. Which in turn means that A. D's agent is Thomas Molloy. The question now is: how soon is he going to try to take the Sword?"

"There's another question," Harry corrected to woman. "Where the hell is Dumbledore and the other heads?"

"Well, yes, that too."

"And who is this A. D. person?" Severus added.

"Yes, indeed."

"How soon will Dumbledore and the other heads be back?"

"Alright, alright!!!! No more questions! One thing at the time!" Rowena said and put her teacup down. "First things first: who is A. D? Do you know anything Severus?"

The Potion Master nodded thoughtfully. "Perhaps, but it is only a thought."

"Nevertheless, share it with us." Harry said. "We need to restore some normality into this insanity."

"As you wish. There is a Russian wizard who collects magical artefacts, the thing is: he isn't too fond of paying for them. Rather, he wants them stolen and brought to him on a silver platter. Voldemort often went to him when he was in need of some Dark Artefact or other. His name is Amadeus Dimitrov, but by my calculations he should be over 80 years old by now."

"So? Just look at Dumbledore, and he's over 160!"

"True."

"So now we have the who, the why and the how." Helga said. "The only thing we are missing is the when."

Harry thought for a bit. "Probably sometimes in the close future. Molloy has already been discovered by impostor-McGonagall, and he knows it will only be a matter of days before the supposed Dumbledore finds out as well. When is the next check-up on the Sword?"

"In two days time, if I remember correctly." Severus replied.

"That's it, then," the impostor-Dumbledore said, his blue eyes twinkling. "Molloy will probably offer to go down and check up on it, and we will follow him. There's no need to put the entire school in danger and try to capture the man in one of the corridors or the halls."

"And down there we have the help of a certain dragon and other creatures of Hagrid's." Severus nodded, a smirk growing on his face. "It really is a shame that you weren't put in Slytherin, Potter."

Harry just grinned and Rowena and Helga shook their heads fondly. Men!

------------

There, that's done. What do you think?

This story has also gone from SLASH to PRE-SLASH.

Thanks to:

grand admiral chelli, chaser1, athenakitty, Discordia-Erebus, Serpent of Light, Digi Bonds, Luna Negra, Wynjara, echo2, insanechildfanfic, Mei, LovingKitten, zimagesto, Tazthedevilman, elvishchic13, Zoya and Nimohtar.


	10. Chapter 10

**Of Headmasters and Socks**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but the obvious, the rest belongs to JK Rowling.

**Authors Note:** Here it is! Enjoy!

-Chapter Ten-

Harry, Severus and the Four Founders kept a close eye at Molloy during the next couple of days. However, there was nothing that indicated that the man was about to steal a sword.

"Do you think we'll need reinforcements from the rest of the Order?" Harry asked Severus as the two of them were walking to the staff meeting. This meeting was very, very important, as their plan to capture Molloy would depend solely on the actions of the man in question.

"Not really," Severus replied. "We are going to send McGonagall-the-Unspeakable down there with him, and she'll keep him in check long enough for us to get down there and confront them both. I assume you haven't forgotten your duelling skills, Potter?" 

"Not at all, my dear man," Harry said and entered the staff room. At once Dumbledore's cheerful mask fell into place, and the staff meeting began. First there was the problem of a couple of first-year Hufflepuff students somehow always managing to get stuck on the same trick step on their way to the Hufflepuff common room, and now Sprout was demanding to have that step removed.

Next Hagrid began lecturing the entire staff about a group of chimeras that had just moved into the Forbidden Forest and that they had just given birth to several kittens and that everyone should keep away from them for at least the next two months.

'_I doubt anyone who was not Hagrid would approach a chimera willingly – with or without kits.'_ Harry mused and his thoughts were reflected in most of the rest of the staff's faces as well. They'd clearly have to do something about getting those chimeras relocated. Couldn't have those kinds of beasts running around so close to a school full of children, now could they? Making a mental note to call in the Disposal of Magical Creatures Department, Harry went on.

"And now, who wants to do the next check-up on the Sword?" the usually green-eyed man asked innocently. At once the entire room went silent as the grave, before it exploded into a flurry.

"... papers to grade..." 

"... most regrettable, Headmaster!"

"My newest load of seeds..."

"... report on a newly invented charm due Monday at the Ministry..."

"... letter from Aragog..."

"... a date with the Countess of Salisbury..." the last one came from Binns, and Harry and Severus shared a scared look. Bad mental image there.

In seconds the room had emptied except for Harry, Severus, Molloy and McGonagall.

Molloy stood up and walked over to the already standing Harry. "Headmaster, I will go and check up on the Sword."

"Ah," Harry didn't have to fake his delight at this. "Thomas, my boy! How kind of you, but I cannot let you go alone. Hmm, let us see... Minerva?" 

The Impostor-McGonagall turned towards them with a slightly nervous twitch. "Y-yes, Albus?"

Harry grinned and shared a quick look with Severus. "Would you mind escorting young Mr Molloy on his journey down into the Chamber? Out of all of us here, you are the only one who hasn't gone yet."

Seeing no way out of the situation – and having a wonderful opportunity – the McGonagall impostor accepted it and headed for the door. Just as she was to step out of the room, Severus' voice stopped her asking how her cat, Minnie, was.

"Oh, Minnie's fine," came the answer before the woman disappeared quickly followed by Molloy.

"Her cat Minnie?" Harry raised an eyebrow towards the other man.

"It's an inside joke," the Potion Master replied. "She hates it when I call her that, and also hates it when I make fun of her animagi shape. This was just to confirm that the real McGonagall didn't just trade places with the impostor."

"Right. Well, lets get ready ourselves. Salazar will alert us when they enter the Chamber." Harry and Severus quickly parted ways. They needed to change into something more comfortable and easier to move in. There was definitely going to be a duel down there, and maximum movement would be required as there were also Hagrid's beasts to watch out for as well as on-coming spells.

The two black-haired men met at the entrance to the girls bathroom, and Harry wasn't disguised as Dumbledore for once. Entering the bathroom they situated themselves around the room and waited for Salazar's signal.

That signal came a moment later as the Slytherin Founder's head floated through the floor. "Come on you two, McGonagall and Molloy are currently at the early stages of the duel." 

"How early?" Severus asked as Harry opened the sink.

"Still trading insults, hands going for wands." Came the reply. "I'll come down with you just in case you need someone to go for backup." The ghost said and disappeared down the pipe.

Harry took a deep breath and jumped in as well. Down on the bottom he made sure that he was out of Severus' way, and the two of them didn't even bother to brush their clothes off before heading on inwards.

As soon as they reached the last doorway they could both hear and see the spells and curses that were being shot to and fro. Add to that the roars of some rather angry beasts and you had a cacophony of sounds that hadn't been heard since the last battle with Voldemort.

The two men ducked a couple of spells that came out of the doorway, and peeked into the chamber beyond. On one side stood a young woman, barely twenty-five years of age, wearing McGonagall's robes and was wielding her wand with expertise. On the other side stood Molloy himself and it was clear that the man had more experience with duelling. It was also clear that he was the one who was winning. All around the two battlers were stunned beasts, and only Norbert seemed unconcerned and untouched by the spells flying to and fro. The dragon was calmly lying by the wall, his head resting on the feet of the statue of Slytherin, and he was watching the entire scene with interest.

"_Stupefy_!" Harry yelled pointing his wand at Molloy. The other man didn't expect this and went down without any further duelling.

At the same time Severus had yelled "_Expelliarmus_!" with his wand pointed at the young woman, and she ended up wandless and a second later bound by magical ropes.

"That was surprisingly easy," Harry commented as he walked towards the stunned Molloy. Breaking the man's wand and tying him up was rather fun in Harry's opinion. It was payback for all the times that the man had worried them over the past month! 

Severus levitated the furious young woman and headed towards the exit again along with Harry. Neither of them wanted to be there when the stunned creatures woke up again, hungry and pissed off.

They took the two people to the staff room and first they released the young woman. Obviously she wasn't totally stupid as she didn't try to run, but instead sat down in one of the chairs with a sigh. Molloy they left as he was, and then turned towards her.

"Well?" the Head of Slytherin House finally snapped. "Start talking, or do you want us to fetch veritaserum?"

The woman glared, but started talking. "I am agent 48 of the Unspeakables. Once we learned that the Sword of Jean D'Arc was going to be placed here at Hogwarts for safekeeping and that Amadeus Dimitrov wanted to steal it, we decided to step in. And here I am."

"Short and to the point, ey?" Harry smirked. "Just one question though: where is the real Minerva McGonagall?" 

"She was told of the situation and agreed on an improvised sudden holiday."

"When will she come back?" Severus asked.

"This weekend."

Nodding in acceptance, Harry and Severus delivered Molloy over to the young Unspeakable and watched as she promptly left Hogwarts.

"Well," Harry sighed. "That's done then." 

Severus nodded. "Now we only have to find Albus, and when we do I am going to have some serious words with that man. Not that I think it'll help any."

"You and me both." The green-eyed man rubbed his eyes. It was barely lunch and he was already dead tired. Oh yes, words with Albus Dumbledore were a must once the old coot showed up again.

The next couple of days passed quickly, but no words came of the missing headmasters and headmistresses from around the world. The role of hyperactive headmaster was finally taking its toll on Harry, and each night he would fall asleep before his head hit the pillow. Not the mention all the letters and other formal things that had to be taken care of. Luckily Minerva returned that weekend as promised and started helping out again. It had been difficult enough trying to keep the other teachers from figuring out that something was wrong before, it had become pure hell when the Unspeakable took over Minerva's role.

None of them could take the stress much longer. Even Godric and Salazar didn't argue as much as they had used to, both being 'overworked and underpaid' as they had the duty of keeping watch over the Hogwarts grounds and the Forbidden Forest in case Albus – or any trace of him – showed up suddenly.

Severus, when he wasn't busy trying to keep other teachers from figuring things out or other school-related work, was constantly avoiding Trelawney. The old bat as after him it seemed, being completely set on telling him something about Albus, a competition and the esteemed Headmaster's death. Well, the esteemed Headmaster was going to die as soon as he showed up at Hogwarts again. Severus (and Harry and Minerva) was going to see to that personally. He was also going to make sure that the old coot had no way of coming back or haunting any of them in the future.

There was a short report in the Daily Prophet about the dead Chinese Headmaster that had been found in Transylvania. Apparently the man had suffered from a heart attack, which wasn't totally unexpected as the man was nearly 240 years old.

One night all three – Severus, Harry and Minerva – were having a private meeting in the Headmaster office trying to figure out what to do next. The Weasley twins had finally found their way out of Aberforth's house and had reported that there was nothing there at all, but that they had gotten some splendid ideas for their joke shop.

"What if he's... dead?" Minerva asked hesitantly. "We cannot keep this charade up for much longer."

"People will start wondering where the Boy Who Lived has disappeared off to." Severus muttered totally ignoring the woman's question. "It has been nearly three months since you last appeared in _Witch Weakly_ or the _Quibbler_." He added to Harry.

"I know," Harry sighed. "And if Albus is dead, well, there isn't much we can do but try to find his body and tell the public the truth."

Suddenly the three of them heard the spiral staircase just outside the door moving and shared a look before Harry quickly turned into a replica of the missing Dumbledore. A second later the door opened and in strode-

"ALBUS?!" three voices shouted in surprise.

There, what do you think? Just one more chapter and this story is done.

Thanks to:

Wolflady, chaser1, DuchessAndromeda, Lady Malfoy I, Skysha-Tranqui, athenakitty, Tazthedevilman, grand admiral chelli, Digi Bonds, Rory, dark 672, zimagesto, Loving Kitten, Aki no Yume1, Obsessive Fanfic Reader (amy and Kaaera.


	11. Chapter 11

**Of Headmaster and Socks**

**Disclaimer:** I own only the obvious, the rest belongs to JK Rowling.

**Authors Note: **Last chapter mates. Enjoy!

-Chapter Eleven-

The old Headmaster grinned at them all and proudly held up a gold cup shaped like two old wool socks. "I won it this time! HAHA!"

Three looks were exchanged. Apparently the Headmaster had gone even more batty than before.

"Eh, Albus?" Minerva ventured hesitantly.

"Yes, my dear?" the newly arrived man asked as he moved into the room and placed the cup proudly on his desk. Then he turned and spotted the replica standing there. "Wonderful work Harry! I could be looking into a mirror!"

Harry quickly changed into himself again. "Uh, Headmaster, where have you been?"

"You didn't know?"

Three people shook their heads.

Dumbledore blinked. "Didn't Sybil tell you anything?"

"What does she have to do with anything?" Severus asked. No one sane would ever willingly stay in the old frauds company.

"She knew exactly where I was going. I am afraid I had to leave on a rather short notice, but this beauty was worth it!" he once again looked proudly at the cup standing on his table.

Minerva approached the silver-bearded wizard. "So... where _have_ you been?"

"I was asked to join in the Annual Headmaster Sock-Hunt," Dumbledore declared with great aplomb. "It is only held once every 80 years and is a unique opportunity to meet other Headmasters from other countries and talk while we all hunt for the most important things to a Headmaster: the golden wool socks."

Harry blinked. "Let me get this straight. You have been out there for three months doing nothing else but chase a couple of wool socks around the world?"

"Pretty much, yes."

"And it never occurred to you to send us a letter or something?" Severus demanded.

"I told Sybil everything, you should have listened to her."

The three _sane_ people in the room shared a 'look'. One of those that promised a painful death to someone else, in this case that 'someone else' being Albus Dumbledore. At the exact moment that the three started to move for their wands, the Four Founders flew through the wall and stopped short upon seeing Harry as himself and Dumbledore in the room as well.

"What is going on here?" Godric asked.

"Yeah, who're you?" Salazar demanded glaring at the true Dumbledore. "Harry, why aren't you in disguise?"

"Are you Aberforth Dumbledore?" Helga asked.

"I am Albus."

"Prove it!" Rowena said, her head held high.

Harry suddenly felt a slight tug on his robes and looked down. Severus was discretely tugging him towards the door where Minerva was already disappearing, and followed the Potion Master. The two of them quickly made their way out and down the staircase as Albus was interrogated by the Four Founders.

"What?" the green-eyed young man asked once they reached the bottom.

"You did eat Albus' sherbet lemons, right?" Minerva asked and Harry nodded. "Well, when he finds out, all three of us better be far away from here."

Harry blinked and turned to the Potion Master. "About that holiday to Hawaii-"

"Already packed and waiting in the Entrance Hall." Severus replied. "You?"

"I have nothing else here but the clothes I stand in," Harry said.

"I think I will join you," Minerva shot in, summoned a House-Elf and gave a few quick orders. "I hear that Hawaii is a wonderful place for old people."

The two men shared a look and then nodded.

Five minutes later the three met up in the Entrance Hall and quickly exited the castle. It was just in time too as they heard a shocked yell form the castle, followed by, "MY SHERBET LEMONS!!!!!!! POTTER!!!!!!"

The three out on the lawn started running towards the end of the wards and apparated as soon as they were free. A second later an enraged Albus Dumbledore was found storming out of the castle and apparating himself. He was in turn followed by the Four Founders, though the ghosts stopped at the bottom of the stairs leading out of the castle.

"And they call us impossible," Salazar remarked to Godric.

0000--0000

A bit short, but oh well.

Well, that's that. This story is officially done.

Perhaps there will be a sequel with Harry, Severus and Minerva in Hawaii being chased by Dumbledore, but I don't think so. If anyone wants to take that up as a challenge, please tell me first. It doesn't have to be half as insane as this one was – heck, it can be a tragedy if you want – as long as it involves Harry, Severus and Minerva vacationing to a place of your choosing and being chased by a vengeful Albus Dumbledore for some reason or other.

And please tell me first if you're going to take up the challenge.

Thanks to:

Delinka, Kaaera, Elven Warrior1, Wolflady, grand admiral chelli, Discordia-Erebus, athenakitty, ShadowedHand, Rory, FantasyChick, Lady Malfoy I, chaser1, Baroness Jumping Rain; Sidda, Stahchild, Jay, musicgirl141, Lady Lily3, StolenDreamer, Arizosa, Wynjara and demongirl12000.

And thanks to anyone else who reviewed this story – or is going to review it in the future.


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